


Constellation Prize

by EverettArcade



Category: Star Wars, Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Music, Because all my fics are wordplay, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Resolved Sexual Tension, Rockstar Wars. Am I right.
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-19
Updated: 2017-05-26
Packaged: 2018-06-09 08:56:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 25,590
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6899497
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EverettArcade/pseuds/EverettArcade
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A (Rock)Star Wars AU<br/>That's basically all you need to know. </p><p>--</p><p>Rey had walked about four blocks when a paper that was being carried by the wind caught around her leg. She tried shaking it off without a second thought until she realized what this paper was. It was a flier. She leaned down to study the information on the page. It was an advertisement. For a show. One night only. Starkiller.</p><p>Fate had a funny way of working.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

“It's official, The _New Republic_ is gone!”

A dark haired man with rugged good looks and a burnt orange t-shirt rushed through the doors of a small conference room, meeting the astonished gaze of two peers who were sitting around an office table eating lunch.

“What did you say?!” Another man, slightly younger than the first, rose to his feet, “You can’t be serious!”

“Heard it straight from the boss herself, Finn” the urgency was evident in his voice, “it hasn’t gone public yet, but it’s a done deal.”

Finn whispered a harsh explicative under his breath. Sinking back down into his chair, he folded over into his lap, shaking his head slowly in his hands. "Poe, what are we going to do?"

Though no one spoke any further for the moment, everyone knew what this news meant. What little career _The Resistance_ had hoped to have… was over.

 _The Resistance_ was a small group, virtually unknown in most circuits. Though recently they somehow had gotten their hopes up that things would change. They had finally gotten their big break, the opening act for _The New Republic_ on their new national tour. _The New Republic_ was easily one of the greatest bands in the world, their tour dates had nearly sold out the day they became available, their fans screamed at the mention of their name. But now… that was all over. If there were no band, there would be no tour. If there was no tour, there was no need for an opening.

“Rey, you aren't saying anything.” Poe turned to face a girl in ill-fitting clothes and a sloppy bun. She had just stared at the floor and continued to nibble at her sandwich since he had broken the news.

“Nothing to say,” she managed to murmur. But in truth, her head was reeling, and her heart was breaking. Yesterday, for the first time in her life, she thought she was about to live a life worth living… and in just a few passing moments that promising future had vanished. Her future, in her mind's eye, was now strangely reflective of her past. Empty. Rey had never known a true day of glory in her life, and she just had her first taste of it, and now it was being ripped from her.

“This isn’t the end.” Poe shared Rey’s concern. “We will keep going, the label seems confident in us!”

“Their 'confidence' doesn’t pay bills,” she snapped, kicking the table, a bit out of her usual character.

“We will figure it out. Together.” Finn reassured, now beginning to fear Rey's reaction more than his own.

“What even happened?” She finally looked to Poe, with an intensity that made him afraid to answer.

“ _The First Order_ happened.” He rolled his eyes, mocking the infamous label with his tone. “Ro-Kiintor found a loophole in his contract, went rogue and signed with them.”

“You’ve got to be kidding,” Finn sighed. Though he had no room to judge. He had been in a similar situation and had left that same label to work with _The Resistance_ awhile back. After years of unsuccessful torture trying to make music with The First Order, he stormed out.

But Finn was a no-name, his ‘treachery' had been mostly overlooked.

“He went solo?” Rey glared.

“Worse. Joined _Starkiller_. He's gonna be their new guitarist I guess.” He rubbed his face, trying his best to stay positive for his friends, but his steadily slipping optimism didn’t fool anyone.

“ _Starkiller!_?” Rey jumped to her feet, grabbing the edge of the table looking as if she were about to flip it. Finn grabbed his food to protect it. “That trash heap? He left the biggest band in the nation to join that grunge rock garbage?”

“They’ve been after him for some time, apparently, I don’t know, that’s all Leia told me,” Poe finished, “I don’t even know what to think right now, I thought this was our chance.”

“We all did,” Finn sighed. The room was met again with silence, everyone waiting for someone to come up with something a bit more motivational.

“I… I’m gonna take a walk.” The chair scraped against the wooden floor and Rey began her triumphant storm out of the room.

“Do you want company?” Finn added, prepping to follow.

“No,” she snarled. Realizing her voice may have been overly harsh she turned to look back before exiting, “sorry, I just want to be alone.”

Rebel Alliance Records was legendary among other labels.  They were most prominent in the late seventies, but still had _The New Republic_ to keep them a powerhouse in the industry. It was the best day of Rey’s life when Leia Organa had approached Poe about signing them to their label. Today's news was hard for everyone, and Rey knew she was selfish for thinking it was particularly worse for her.

Rey had grown up in a less than ideal situation. She told herself how much worse it could’ve been, and at least she had a place to sleep at night. She told herself that for fifteen years. She had served as more of a paycheck than a child, and was forced to drop out of school to work for her foster father's scrap metal business. Being a high school drop out left little opportunities for Rey's future, so she had come to accept that she wouldn't have one. She told herself the moment she turned eighteen she would run. But over a year past her eighteenth birthday, she was still slicing herself on spare parts.

But she had music. She picked it up relatively late in life, but it was a talent that was meant for her. She would sing in her alone time, and pluck away on guitar strings until she heard something she liked. Trying to replicate whatever sounds she heard on the radio for hours until her fingers reached a combination that worked.

Rey had met Finn shortly after he left his contract with _The First Order_. She had been able to land a gig playing at a coffee shop just outside of the city. Finn was there alone and watched all of the sets, but Rey's sound, in particular, had interested him, and after her bit, they talked about music for hours. He told her he belonged behind a drum set. She told him, while she sang, she just preferred plucking on strings, which was perfect because that was exactly what Poe Dameron was looking for.

Within a month of exchanging numbers, the three of them were inseparable. Poe would gloat about his days, three days to be precise, as a fill-in guitarist for _The New Republic_ , Finn would retell his horror stories of _The First Order_ and Rey, well, Rey would just listen and hope that it could be like this forever. Maybe with just a little more income.

She recalled the day Leia had approached them about going on tour with _The New Republic_. Rey was sure it was a joke, or maybe just wishful thinking, never did she think it would be an actual offer! The room was met with an overwhelming amount of approval, and sure enough, they were all signing their names on contracts guaranteeing they would perform alongside them. It would appear those contracts didn’t mean anything, though.

Sure, the remaining members of _The New Republic_ would probably take legal action or something, but that wouldn’t change the outcome. Rey, Finn, and Poe…they were still out of a job and it felt like going back to square one. They still had a label that believed in them, and she tried reminding herself of that, but what if a new opportunity never came?

Rey had walked about four blocks when a paper that was being carried by the wind got caught around her leg. She tried shaking it off without a second thought until she realized what this paper was. It was a flier. She leaned down to study the information on the page. It was an advertisement. For a show. One night only. _Starkiller_.

Fate had a funny way of working.

\--

When Rey had returned to the office, she didn’t leave for hours. She felt almost evil as she schemed with the flier in her hands. As the hours passed, most of the other artists and employees had gone home, but Rey lingered behind the desk that was considered hers, tapping her fingers restlessly.

“How long do concerts usually last?” Rey blurted out as Poe finally gave up, standing from his desk a few over from hers, prepping to leave.

“Says the wanna-be musician?” Poe raised an eyebrow.

“Yes.”

“Couple hours… I guess,” he replied cooly.

“So, if a show started at eight, they would be done by ten?”

“I would say 10:30.” He began his stride towards the door, passing directly in front of Rey, spotting the flier on her table. He smiled. “Don’t do anything stupid.” He zipped up his jacket and went on his way, and she heard the door close behind him. She was nearly alone now in the vast sea of cubicles. For a creative environment, it was terribly corporate looking sometimes. The room had beautiful colors, though, and at a certain point, that is all she could ask for after a lifetime of gray.

Though Finn was also signed with the label as an artist, he took on another almost secretarial job for the building. Which often meant he stayed late and didn’t go home until everybody else did. Making Rey his worst enemy at this particular moment. He could have left anytime after six, but any office damages would be pinned on him.

“Rey, you aren’t planning on sleeping here tonight are you?” He finally spat out from his desk near the doors, the clock getting dangerously close to ten.

“No, go home Finn,” she lied. Though she knew he was joking about sleeping here, she was a notorious couch hopper and didn’t like to overstay her welcome. So whenever she wanted to wait a few days before asking a friend to stay with them again, she would just stay in the studio. She hadn’t been reprimanded for it yet, so she continued to do it. “I’m heading out now, have a place to be.” Looking at her phone for the time, she hopped up from her chair to prepare her things to head out, grabbing her coat and throwing some papers from the day in her bag.

“Where are you going?” Finn leaped up as well as Rey stormed by him, struggling to put her arms through her jacket out of frustration.

“ _Starkiller_ has a show tonight downtown,” she barked, “gonna go to the stage door and punch one of them in the face.”

“That was what you were scheming all day?” Finn looked for a moment as if he was going to argue with her, then just simply added, “have fun!”

Rey pushed out the building doors and folded her arms into her body after her skin was met with the brutal cold. Though she would never in her wildest dreams miss her old home, at this moment she may have preferred the overwhelming heat. The theater the show was being held at was just a short train ride away, and the show would be ending soon enough.

She didn’t mind the subway, only the people. For every one person who knew about personal space, there were five who didn’t. She put in her headphones and tried to zone out as people shoved and squeezed next to her.

Until that song came on. That horrible shrill trash that had somehow made it onto her playlist after curiosity had gotten the best of her and she downloaded it a few months ago. 'They were garbage,' she thought as the intricate guitar riffs built, absolute garbage, but she never thought to just skip the song.

The bloodcurdling sound of screaming fans led her the rest of the way. Emerging from the station that had nearly lead right in front of the venue, Rey rolled her eyes at the enthusiasm for these monsters. Their music was tasteless noise, and their group members were nothing better if they broke up a popular band just for their own benefit.

People were so quickly swept away by the idea of ‘celebrity.' Rey found the whole concept of it rather pathetic. While she wanted to have a successful music career and knew that meant some recognition, it’s why she preferred her backup role. Appreciation for her talents would be accepted, but this sort of fan infatuation was not something she envied.

As she rounded the back of the theater to the stage door, she found herself in the middle of a massive crowd. A shrill group screech, louder than the rest, emerged from the horde in front of her that insinuated someone of importance had shown up. Rey began pushing her way to the front, being cussed out along the way.

“Don’t worry. I’m not getting an autograph! I’m just here to punch someone!” She finally bit back after more than one harsh insult was thrown at her. They replied with something along the lines of ‘well, I’d like to see that’ and Rey made her way to the low gate that kept people from getting too close to the musicians.

Only three of the band members were out, Ro-Kiintor wouldn’t begin his tour with them for some time, saying his departure from _The New Republic_ hadn’t even hit newsstands yet. The first one she saw was the red haired bassist. He was front and center milking the attention for all it was worth. Rey scoffed at his obviously inflated ego but appreciated that he was still able to act like he cared for everyone in the crowd. Shortly behind him was the platinum blonde drummer whose height landed just over the already tall ginger. _'Is there a height requirement for Starkiller?'_ Rey thought as the last member who made it out stopped nearly directly in front of her.

She froze. It was her chance to make her statement, and it was going to slip quickly.

“It’s you?” The third member spoke, he was directly in front of her now, and he was no doubt talking to her. She avoided eye contact at all costs but she could feel his eyes burning into her skin. At last, she looked up at him through squinted eyes. He was so close. Dark haired and towering, but not necessarily intimidating looking, almost pretty. For a moment felt sorry that she was clenching her fist, preparing to let it fly.

“What?” Rey said, her intrigue briefly overtaking her rage.

“Oh! Well, uh-“ he stammered, “you- you are the girl, _The Resistance_ girl aren’t you?”

Did he know her? The Resistance had a minuscule following, mostly just friends, family, and a few fans of Poe from the days where he filled in for _The New Republic_ , but there was no way someone like him should know who they were.

 _‘Unless… he did his research on The New Republic and knew we were working with them,’_ she thought as her fist tightened again.

“Yeah, and tell Ro-Kiintor I said hello.” She smiled as she wound up her fist and let it go, making contact, near missing the bridge of his nose. He took a step back from the power of the hit bringing a hand to his face as the crowd screamed in shock.

He said nothing. He didn't do anything. Just mouthed the word ‘Whoa.’

Rey needed to run, and the crowd pressed against her making it nearly impossible to escape. She attempted to squeeze through, but a bodyguard grabbed onto her shoulder and violently tugged her over the short barricade. She fell hard on the concrete then the guard yanked her back up, pulling her arms behind her back. The fans were in an absolute uproar, and now this was worth the overpriced ticket. This was the point where Rey had realized she had screwed herself over completely, so she drove her point home by spitting right in the dark haired man’s chest as the guard escorted her away. He did nothing.

To her, he was the garbage who selfishly took her dream of a worthy life away from her.

To him, she was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note: Ro-Kiintor is a senator from "Before the Awakening" and mentioned in "Bloodline"
> 
> Thanks for reading!!!  
> http://inexorably-drawn-to-you.tumblr.com/


	2. Chapter 2

“You're lucky, kid,” an officer said, flipping through some paperwork in his hands, “they aren’t pressing charges, you are free to go-“

Rey had been sitting alone in what she assumed was an interrogation room for hours. It had now reached the early hours of the morning and she had done everything she could to try to keep herself awake just sitting there. The room was small and desolate. A table, two chairs, and a clearly two-sided mirror people were watching her through.

She fiddled with her thumbs for a moment and wondered if that was truly the end of it. The officer, illuminated in light from the doorway, looked down at her.

“Sometimes rockstars deserve it,” he laughed, it was good to know he was on her side, despite having no idea what the context of the situation was, “I would have loved to see that- I hope someone was taping!”

Rey cursed under her breath. She hadn’t quite thought this. Surely someone was filming, cameras were everywhere. She was nearly blinded by them the whole time. She wanted to make her statement but didn’t think about any of the repercussions for her actions, or worse, how it would affect her friends. If somehow this changed The Resistance’s chance of getting on another tour she would bury herself right here and now.

“Thank you, sir, I guess,” Rey said quietly, picking up her jacket from the floor, alongside the phone that had fallen from her pocket, “sometimes they do deserve it.”

He laughed again.

The late night patrol didn’t even glance at her as she made her way out the double doors. Maybe this wouldn’t be such a spectacle after all and she could go on her way knowing that her pent up aggression had been released. Despite her concerns about the morning news reports, a part of her was still oddly proud of herself.

The bitter cold shocked her again, stepping out into the harsh winds that had gotten worse as the night went on. The subway hopefully wasn’t too far, but she didn’t know where she was. At this hour she debated just taking a cab, but with no promise of a stable job she cringed at the thought.

She trotted down the stairs that lead up to the station and noticed somebody smoking at its base. Rey assumed it was an officer on a break and did her best to avoid eye contact to get home as soon as possible.

“I told them to let you go the second they brought you here,” the voice said, following a puff of smoke.

_Of course, it was him._

“How noble,” she mocked, turning to the figure, suddenly fixated on the purple bruise forming around his left eye. She was desperate to keep up her tough appearance after everything, though.

“Don’t worry. I get it.” He puffed again. “I don’t know what I did, but I probably deserved it.”

_Doesn’t know?_

“Yeah, right.” she asserted, drowning the statement in sarcasm.

Raising an eyebrow, he cocked his head towards her. “Would I really be here at three in the morning after a show if I knew exactly what I did to deserve this?”

“I don’t know you, maybe!” Rey replied, throwing her arms out in front of her.

“I wouldn’t,” he said, “and I didn’t know if or where I would run into you again so... here I am” he went to rub his dripping nose from the cold and shuttered as he accidentally hit part of the bruised area by his eye.

“It’s because of you _The New Republic_ ended their tour!” Rey shivered, folding her arms in as firmly to her body as humanly possible. 

_Silence._

“…Big fan of theirs or something?” he looked honestly confused, unable to find the correlation.

“Shut up, you prick, we were their opening act for their new tour!” she paused, his earnest look of cluelessness did not subside, “or at least we were.”

“What?” He started, “I’m sorry, I didn’t know.” He didn’t seem sympathetic, but he did read as honest.

“Of course you knew! How else would you know me?” She accused, about to ram her finger into his chest, but thinking better of doing that right in front of the Police Station in which she was just nearly arrested for assaulting him.

“Uh-“ his confidence was clearly shaken easily, “It’s a long story, and it’s cold, but I’ve heard your stuff, I mean _The Resistance’s,_ and you- well, you, in particular, are… easy to remember,” this was not the best way of telling someone he thought they were talented, but it sufficed.

“Okay.” She turned away ending the conversation. She still had no idea where she was going but it was probably best to remove herself from the situation before she ended up kicking him in the gut.

“Train station is the other way,” he called after her, “assuming that is what you are looking for…“

She continued forward, ignoring the advice. She’d rather grab a wallet emptying cab around the corner than give in to the humiliation that she took four steps in the wrong direction.

“Or, since it’s the least I can do, I can take you home,” he called after her one more time, she ignored this, “It’s free.” Magic words that finally got her attention. She was out of a job because of him, might as well take advantage of it, right? She shook her head.  The cold was overtaking her common sense. Sure, he was a man in the public eye, but he was still a stranger. Then a particularly harsh wind came by and she couldn’t be bothered by her stubbornness any further.

“Fine,” She snapped and he lit up as she turned around in a huff, “but if you murder me, I’m going knock out your other eye.”

“Sounds more than fair,” he smirked as they walked in tandem towards the station's parking lot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Even though all the chapters are fairly short, this one is a little shorter! But wanted to get a few chapters out quickly.
> 
> Tumblr  
> http://inexorably-drawn-to-you.tumblr.com/


	3. Chapter 3

“No seriously, it was a nice punch! Your form was a little off, but in the end, all that matters is the power behind it!” he said, pulling up to the front of the _Rebel Alliance_ building. He almost glared at the sign as it came into view, but shook it off. She tried not to smile as the car slowed, putting her hand on the door handle. “Are you sure this is where you want to be dropped off? I don’t mind -“ 

“This is fine,” she said quickly, “Thank you.”

He looked over to her and didn’t respond, just met her gaze and after a brief moment she looked off.

“And sorry… about your eye.”

“I think it’s fitting actually,” he chimed in, shifting his car into park as she gathered her stuff to leave, “I’ll probably miss it when it’s gone.”

She did let herself smile this time. “Goodnight.” She opened her door and slid out.

\- -

“Rey, are you in here?” A familiar voice called out, somewhat panicked. The lights flickered on in the recording booth and Rey nearly hit her head darting up from her sleeping spot under the desk. Poe kneeled down to where she was, and she could immediately tell he was not particularly pleased, “a few things, one: stop sleeping here, you can sleep at my place or Finn’s place any time you want, or even Leia has offered!” He pulled up another finger as he counted, “two: it was an absolute dream come true to see you punch Kylo Ren in the face on television, three: why the _fuck_ did you punch Kylo Ren in the face on television?” 

“Kylo Ren?” she blinked, “Oh, I guess I never found out his name,” she surprised herself at the realization, she had spent no less than an hour talking to him after the incident but never thought about asking for his name. He probably assumed she already knew, saying she was stage door for his concert, but even though she had heard of Starkiller prior, she was never bothered enough to learn about their individual members.

“It’s all over those trashy entertainment shows, saw it on _H-Prime TV_ this morning, they caught everything, right down to the bodyguard dragging you away with your hands behind your back” Poe sighed, “I’m surprised I didn’t get the call to pick you up from the police station.”

Rey finally crawled out from underneath the desk and Poe helped her to her feet. “The guy actually brought me home, or here rather. They didn’t press charges or anything.”

“The guy?”

“The Kylo Ren guy, that was his name, right?” the two of them walked out into the central office that was separated by a short elevated hallway from the booth. Tired looking employees had begun to file in slowly and a couple of them gave Rey an approving thumbs up as they had apparently heard the story. “I think he felt bad or something? He offered to take me here after they released me.”

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” Just at that moment, Finn came bursting into the room. He tossed his backpack over his desk and it spilled onto the floor, but he didn’t care. He ran over to Rey and swung her around in a gigantic hug.

“You actually did it!” He said, putting her back down on the floor. “Man, I’ve wanted to do that for years, even before all this, especially Ren, he’s the worst fucking one.”

This surprised Rey, he really wasn’t that bad from what she had seen from last night. She was, by far, the worse of the two given what had been exchanged. She almost felt sorry that he was the one she ended up punching. A little cocky maybe, and the smoking was a pretty disgusting habit, but he could have been far worse.

“He brought her back from the Police Station,” Poe told him, “our girl punched a man in the face and he offers to drive her home…”

“I spat at him too,” she admitted ashamedly.

“You punch and spit at a pretty internationally famous rockstar, and he drives you home. Dear Lord, Rey!” Poe laughed, so hard that he had to grab his sides. “You really must be magic!”

She pushed him playfully and some people from the office began to crowd her with questions, all enthusiastically excited over the headline it caused.

“Who knows, maybe this publicity stunt will help us out!” Poe said, tossing up a hand as he made his way out of the crowd that surrounded his friend. Finn weaseled his way out to abandon her to be the center of attention.

“It wasn’t a publicity stunt!” She yelled back at him as more people came listen to her story firsthand. Luckily that moment was short lived.

“Is Rey in yet?” a voice came from around Finn’s desk. He didn’t even need to answer before the carrier of the voice came to its own conclusion. “Guessing by the huge mob of slacking employees, I assume she is already being interrogated somewhere in that mob.”

“Yes, Ma’am,” she said sheepishly, pushing her way out, raising a hand so she could be spotted, “Leia, I’m so sorry about last night, I was angry and made a foolish decision, and please…”

“Eh, he deserves it,” Leia stopped her, but maybe sounding a bit discouraged, “even though it’s not his fault Ro-Kiintor is a traitor.” She signaled for Rey to follow, grabbing Finn and Poe along the way. The four of them walked into her office and Leia closed the door. She took a seat behind her desk, while the other three made themselves comfortable in the chairs scattered around the room. “So, I take it you didn’t take the news of the tour ending very well,” she smiled sadly, looking at Rey in particular.

“It was a rough day for all of us,” Poe said, jumping to her defense.

“We are going to do everything we can to make sure you guys get another job,” Leia assured.

Leia Organa was everything Rey aspired to be from the moment she met her. She was the ideal woman in her head. Successful, powerful, loving but terrifying. There wasn’t a single person that worked for her that would argue that. She was wildly revered and her presence made Rey nervous at times. Leia was a legend and Rey was just some nobody from the desert. The woman had even offered her a place to stay when Rey had first moved here, but she had declined and had been living on couches since then. That was nearly a year ago.

“Thanks, Leia.” Finn smiled. They may have all felt a little better in that brief moment.

“Now, about that little stunt you pulled last night,” the attention turned back to Rey, “while this media attention won’t be the worst thing that has ever happened to you, it doesn’t put you in an excellent light.” She leaned her elbows on her desk and folded her hands in front of her face. “You don’t need to do anything yet, but surely someone is going to come sniffing around here looking for a statement, I just recommend when you give one, make sure you sound like the good guy.”

“Okay,” Rey nodded.

“But… just avoid telling them about _The New Republic_ until the story breaks, they are having a formal press conference about their canceled tour tomorrow. So just be vague with your answers, okay?”

“What am I supposed to say then? The whole reason I went down there was because of what happened with the tour!” She began to panic. Lying had never been her strong suit.

“Just say he hurt your feelings or something and you acted rashly, it can be simple.”

“He doesn’t have the reputation for being the nicest guy in the world, I think everyone would believe it at that,” Finn added, shooting a quick glance at Leia to make sure he didn't overstep his boundaries by saying that.

“But that’s going to sound like I just hooked up with him and he never called me back.” Usually, she wouldn’t be so informal about those concerns with her boss, but if the whole point of her making a statement was to save face, this was a legitimate inquiry.

Leia looked shocked for a moment but then snorted. She cleared her throat and began again, “I guess you aren’t wrong, then maybe it is best for you to avoid the press, at least until tomorrow.”

“That I can do.” Rey wasn’t planning on leaving the office today… or tonight anyway. Though she should probably shower eventually. But that luxury could wait until after _The New Republic_ said their formal goodbyes.

“Feel free to keep coming into the offices like you’ve been doing,” Leia finished, addressing the whole group again. “Important people show up often, it’s a good way to make connections, we will get you back out there soon!” With that she dismissed them and they started their way out, she called for Rey one last time before she was out the door. “Rey, just in case someone calls looking to speak with you, I’m going to give them your work e-mail, so that you can take your time responding and think everything through. ”

“Oh,” her tone was hushed, “Thank you, Leia,” and she headed back towards her adopted desk.

Since Rey wasn’t a regular working employee like Finn was, she was never given a proper place to set up at the label. A few desks were left unoccupied, so Poe and herself had claimed them for the time being. She knew she could probably ask Leia for a job similar to Finn’s to help makes ends meet, but Leia had already done so much for her she just couldn’t stomach asking for anything else. Either the pride or the embarrassment had gotten in the way. Rey also hated letting anyone know she was struggling or needed help. Luckily for her, Poe was the only one who realized she had spent a decent amount of nights sleeping under a desk in the recording studio.

Rey booted up the computer on her desk and intensely debated logging onto her e-mail just to see if anyone had even tried to contact her yet. She quickly checked her phone, and no new alerts had been received. From the looks of things, this whole event would just be a bump in the road and a good story in five years. It wouldn’t be a life changing mistake.

She finally bolstered up enough courage to log in to her mail and there was only one new message.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Updates are going to be a little more spaced out after this! Don't worry not too long, since the chapters are all relatively short snippets, just wanted to get a few chapters out right away! 
> 
> Thanks so much for reading!! Your Kudos make me happy!
> 
> Tumblr http://inexorably-drawn-to-you.tumblr.com/


	4. Chapter 4

The next afternoon Rey was just listing the reasons. There were a hundred and one reasons why this was a horrible idea. All of them came marching into her mind one by one as anxiety filled her with each passing minute he didn’t show up. She could have just ignored the e-mail, or replied later, but like an idiot, not only did she respond within minutes, she agreed to the whole suggestion. Now she felt like a fool just standing there outside a busy diner where she was more than likely just going to be stood-up as payback. _This whole thing must have been about that, right?_

She would give him three more minutes until she booked it. It was too cold outside to expect someone to wait so long. Luckily for her, she had not been recognized or followed by anyone who wanted to question her about the incident two days ago, and likely there wouldn’t be after _The New Republic_ finished their press conference. This whole ordeal would be old news in a moments notice after that announcement. She was relieved. A peace that would only last a few minutes longer as she felt the lingering presence of someone standing way too close behind her.

“You better be who I think you are, cause I don’t want to punch two guys in one week,” she said with a chiding smile, trying to mask her nerves. Rey turned around to face the man who was decked out from head to toe in black, wearing a baseball cap and sunglasses though the sun hadn’t made a real appearance since winter arrived.

“Very funny,” he responded, low and a bit monotonous.

“Nice sunglasses, but you are aware the sun hasn’t come out in months, right?” she played, “or are you just too famous to let people see your face?”

“I know it’s been almost a full 48 hours, but did you forget the handiwork that has left one of my eyes swollen shut? It’s a little grotesque,” he scoffed as he lifted his glasses just enough the reveal the purple swelling underneath.  

She felt like an idiot. If her face weren't already red from the cold, it would've been now. Sensing her embarrassment and discomfort, he tapped her shoulder signifying they should head into the restaurant and get out of the cold. After a hostess had instructed them too, they sat in a booth near the back where they hopefully could avoid any sort of recognition.

“Thanks for agreeing to see me,” he said, taking off his hat then ruffling his hair to get it back into place, “I know this must be weird for you.”

Weird was an understatement.

“How did you get my e-mail anyway?”

“Uh,” he was probably just as good at lying as Rey was, “connections, it wasn’t that difficult.” He looked at her a bit strangely, and Rey crossed her arms to cover herself. “You are wearing the same outfit.”

“What?”

“..as the other day, you are wearing the same clothes,” Rey had gone two days at the office without anyone else commenting on it, and five minutes with him he points it out.  

“I do laundry a lot,” she lied, he noticed.

“Or you haven’t left the studio because you were afraid of people asking you questions you were told not to answer.” She blinked at him. It’s like he could read her mind, or he’s been through a similar situation... or maybe a combination of the two. At least he also didn’t assume that she slept there because she didn’t have other options.

“A little bit,” she said, a bit embarrassed. He smiles though in a way that reassures her that he understands. “After this press conference, I’ll be free to leave!”

She had her own drawers at Finn and Poe’s place, and clothes scattered at a couple of the others on her rotation, but vanity was never one of her strong points. She’d kept a change of undergarments with her in her messenger bag, which often led to strange questions when they would peak out from it.  But this was her life and she had grown accustomed to it.

“Then why did you come out to see me?” The waiter had dropped off two glasses of water and Rey choked on hers when he asked. “I mean if you were trying to avoid every-“ 

“You cocky ass.” He smirked as she kicked him under the table. He laughed and maybe she was enjoying herself. “I agreed because I may or may not still feel bad about the other night.” She only did a little bit. “And since the announcement is today, there is no reason to stay in seclusion, all of the paparazzi are over at the conference!”

They talked for a half an hour before actually looking at the menu. Mostly she was the one who talked and he listened. She told him how she’d received no less than fifty e-mails by the end of the day yesterday asking her about the incident. She told him how nervous she was to make any sort of statement on the matter. By the time the waiter checked in for the fifth time they finally ordered food. Ren ordered the most expensive thing on the menu, which was still not much saying they were just at a city diner, but Rey jokingly berated him anyway, assuming this was his way of showing off.

Only when the food arrived had Rey realized how hungry she had become, and how animalistic she was when she was hungry. Forgetting a grilled chicken breast wasn’t traditionally finger food she picked it up and bit into it with vigor. Ren stared, though not necessarily disgusted as much fascinated. She quickly realized what she was doing and how it may look, so she put it down.  She didn’t go out to eat very often.

“Sorry,” she mumbled with a mouth full of food, “I was hungry!”

“No!” He didn’t mean to act like he was offended. “It was kinda cu-,“ he stopped himself by shoving a fork full of food in his mouth.

“Were you just about to say cute?” Rey finished, cheeks still filled.

“You cocky ass,” he repeated to her, mocking her accent, not much more than a second later he seemed deeply distracted.

He leaned to look around her, lifting his sunglasses just enough to try to see more clearly. Rey waved a hand in front of him trying to regain his attention and he quickly held it down. She held her breath at the contact and stared intensely at their hands as they nearly intertwined on the table. Swallowing hard she tried opening her mouth to say something but with a nod he signaled for her to turn around as well.

Photographers. Everywhere. Men and woman of all shapes, sizes, and variations of camera equipment were practically shoving their bodies against the glass windows of the restaurant. The customers inside were beginning to get suspicious and subtly started looking around to try to figure out who these paparazzi were after. Rey prayed that someone else of significance was here aside from him.

“What time is it?” Ren asked, more himself than Rey as he shuffled through his pockets to bring out his phone, “Ah, well that explains it.”

“Explains what?” Rey whispered, the people sitting near them were slowly locking on to the fact that they were the subject of the photographers' frenzy.

“ _The New Republic_ Press conference ended around twenty minutes ago. I’m surprised it took them this long to get here.” He slid his phone back into his pocket and quietly went back to eating his food as if nothing had changed. Rey cocked her head at him and he looked up, “What? I am still paying for this, and I’m still going to eat it. May as well enjoy it.” He tapped on Rey’s plate. “You too.”

“What am I going to say to them?” Her nerves were rising at dangerous levels.

“Nothing, you don’t owe them anything, also if anything they are here for me…”  

“But my boss said…” 

“Your boss doesn’t know anything about this,” he almost snapped. Rey sat up straight. He apologized and explained with a sigh, “they will assume the rest of the story whether it’s true or not, at least now they can’t take anything you say out of context.”

“Isn’t it going to look weird that I’m eating food with you though?”

“We are old friends making amends,” he said so casually that even Rey believed it for a second, she shook her head and laughed it off, “trust me, I’ve been in this game for awhile.” He took a sip of his drink and glared again. Every second that passed the more people were catching on to them. He noticed Rey becoming exceedingly anxious and he reached back into his pocket to bring out his wallet. He put two hundred dollars in cash on the table and stood up, “Let’s get out of here.”

She gaped at the gross amount on the table when the bill couldn’t have been much over thirty dollars. “Oh, let me pay for my half!” Rey reached into her bag to get her own money and he grabbed her hand. She froze again.

“Don’t worry. I’ve got it, let’s just leave.” From there he went on to help her up and his hand drifted from hers to the small of her back as he began to lead her towards the door. “Just keep walking, ignore everyone.” Before they exited he took off his sunglasses and handed them to her, fully revealing the purple swelling. “Take these. They already know it’s me so no use hiding.” Rey adjusted the frames on her face and pulled the hood from her jacket over her head. “Remember, just ignore them, maybe they won’t realize who you are.”

The two continued out the door and were bombarded by flashing lights. Rey lead the way, powering through them. Luckily, she was fairly ignored and Ren followed shortly behind, actually shoving one guy who got a little too close. That sent a message, and in a strange instant everyone started to back off like they were to close to a ticking time bomb. Rey turned around as she noticed the flashing lights stop and Ren caught up with her, his hand on her back again pushing her forward.

To her surprise, no one followed them after that, and they made it to his car without much further issue besides a passerby or two staring for too long. He went to the drivers side door and got out his keys.

“Well, thanks for lunch,” Rey said, looking up at the sky awkwardly, “I guess, I’ll see you around then, the train station is just a little up that way…”

“What? We’ve been through this. No, get in the car.” His tone implied he was not going to let her argue this, she obliged.

Closing their respective doors Ren put the keys in the ignition and turned the heat on blast.

“Uh, so, by any chance did you invite me out so you could be seen with me when the news broke about _The New Republic_? So if people recognized me as the girl from the other night you wouldn’t look as bad?” He looked at her as if she had just punched him again.

“No.” he stared back at the steering wheel, apparently affected by this low opinion.

“Oh.” She looked out the window and appreciated the heat coming in from the car. “Just making sure.”

“I really had nothing to do with _The New Republic_ , you know, I don’t give two shits about Ro,” he admitted, “I was there during the discussions, I guess, even tried to tell them it was a bad idea…that we don’t have the best reputation as it is and it would turn everyone who liked _The New Republic_ against us, which at this point, is the whole world.”

Rey folded her hands in her lap and peeked over at him for a moment. He was a bit dazed.

“They didn’t see it that way, they just saw it as taking out the competition. If we had Ro-Kiintor... then his fans from _The New Republic_ would just follow him wherever he went, right?” He finally turned to her. “I’m sorry. I know this tour must have meant a lot to you if the same had happened to me when I was first starting out… I don’t know what I would do.”

“I’m sorry you’re the one I punched,” she almost smirked.

“I’m not.” she felt her face turn red hot before he continued, “anyone else would have filed a restraining order.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> http://inexorably-drawn-to-you.tumblr.com/


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A Kylo POV.  
> We have sort of reached a Not Safe for work point.

His fascination with her was almost instant. He wasn’t sure how much longer he could safely avoid using the term ‘ _infatuated_.' This sort of feeling was not something he was used too, and not something he particularly enjoyed either. This feeling that somehow had him feeling so anxious and pent up that he had somehow resorted to calling his own mother the day after _it_ happened.

“Hello?” she answered instantly after being transferred by her receptionist.

“Am I speaking to Leia Organa?” He made an idiotic spur of the moment decision to try masking his voice. 

“Speaking,” she said, with the same inflection as a question.

He didn’t think this far. He honestly didn’t think he’d get through to her. “This is… uh… I’m from the Coruscant Gazette and I’m looking…”

“Ben?” No matter how hard he tried, he could never hide from her. “You’ve alway been a terrible liar.” He refused to reply and debated just hanging up to avoid having to confirm his identity. “Were you really just trying to change your voice? Dear Lord, child.”

“Look, mom, I just need an e-mail address,” he said, voice returning its low natural husk.

She paused for a moment, almost shocked he had stayed on the line too. “Looking to steal someone else from us, are you?” 

“It’s the girl, the one whose demo we listened too a couple of years back, remember?”

She does.

“The one who punched you. I’ve already heard.” He could hear the tapping of a pen against a desk through the line, “If you think you are gonna steal her after this I believe that you will find yourself sorely mistaken and your ego bruised.”

“God, Mom,” he sighed, the memories of teenage angst returning to him like a flood of rushing water, “If you had any faith in me then maybe, just maybe, you could see that it’s because I want to apologize for what happened last night.”

“ _You_ want to apologize?” This was strange to her for a couple of reasons. One, he _never_ admitted when he was wrong and two, she was the one who assaulted him, and no matter how much Leia thought he needed some sense knocked into him, that fact remained.

“Yes, mom.” He hated how young he sounded when talking to her.

“Fine,” she groaned, “do you have a pen?”

She gave him the address and he hung up before she had the chance to bring up any other unpleasantness or he managed to humiliate himself any further. That was the first time he had talked to her in a year, and it was to get the contact information of a girl he had driven home from the police station after she punched him.

The message he sent was casual enough, at least that is what he had decided after almost an hour of rewriting. All he was asking was the opportunity to talk in person again, but finding the right words so she may not immediately reject him was the tricky part. It probably wasn’t going to be possible, so he resided himself into pressing send, his head collapsing into his hands. After a minute of regretting every decision he’s ever made, he stood from his desk to wander aimlessly around his apartment to try to distract himself. As soon as he made it to his feet, though, his computer pinged to alert him of a new message.

He clumsily dove back into the chair to see if it was possibly her. _‘It was too soon,’_ he thought, ‘ _it’s only been a couple of minutes,”_. But sure enough, the message read, _‘Sure, why not, when and where?”_

His heart was in his throat.

Twenty-four hours later she was in his car. Just sitting in his passenger seat, tucking small wisps of hair behind her ear.

The afternoon could go one of two ways at this point. He could come up with some place to take her to try to keep her in his company after the paparazzi had interrupted their meal, or she would ask him to take her home. It was just the matter of who spoke first now.

“Uh, so” Ren spoke, taking his opportunity, “Where do you want me to take you?”

“Oh!” She seemed a bit alarmed by the question, “I guess, well, the studio is fine.”

In hindsight, he had worded that question very poorly. He cursed himself slightly, but her answer probably would have been the same no matter the phrasing.

“You have to get back to work?”

“Uh, I guess,” she sputtered, “I don’t have much to do anymore, given the… circumstances” she turned and smirked at him, and motioned back towards where the paparazzi would be, trying to make light of her recent unfortunate situation. His jaw dropped slightly at the curve of her mouth before he snapped out of it.

“Then I’ll take the long way.” He shifted into drive and pulled away.  
\-----

“So you don’t like any of our songs?” Ren laughed as they pulled up to another stoplight, they had been circling the city for almost an hour.

“Hey, I’m not looking for a fight! Not another one.” Rey defended.

“Have you even heard any of our songs?” He turned to her, lifting an eyebrow.

“Yes. I listened to your first album.” Her face turned red at the admission. She had only done it to see what the hype was about and had only listened to it once. It wasn’t her taste at all, but she supposed she could see how others would like it.

“We’ve had two others since then,” he tried to persuade, “you might like one song!”  

“Fine, I don’t mind ‘Maps,’” Rey bit back, hitting his arm, “I don’t love it, but, I won’t change the station if it comes on.”

“I’ll take it!” Ren lifted a hand from the wheel into a victorious fist.

“You wouldn’t like any of my music, so I wouldn’t take it personally,” Ren already knew that wasn’t true, he was nearly hypnotized by her voice by the third song on her demo. His mother was so excited about her, saying a voice like hers only came around once in a generation. He found it strange that Rey preferred not to sing when it came to her group, but Ren kept quiet that he knew that about her.

“I’ve… come across your stuff before, I told you.”

“I mean, my stuff, not The Resistances.”

They turned a corner and came to a stop in traffic. He could feel her eyes looking over at him and he was pretty sure he had never felt more self-aware in his life.

 “I should probably get back, it’s just around the corner, I can hop out here.”

“I can take you around a corner,” he argued.

“Don’t worry about it,” Rey said, grabbing her bag from the car floor, getting ready to leave, “there is probably press galore outside the label right now, it's presumably for the best if I’m not photographed getting in and out of your car more than necessary.”

“Good point.” Though he would have made that sacrifice to spend a few more minutes together, her reasoning was valid.

She swung the door open and hoped out quickly, before shutting it she leaned back in slightly, “Thanks for lunch, next time is on me.” The door slammed and Ren watched her sprint away down the sidewalk until she disappeared around that dreaded corner.

He allowed himself a smug grin as traffic began to move again. _There was going to be a next time._  

From there he debated briefly on what to do next, given the recent rush, but in the end decided to go back to his apartment. He played out the days to follow in his head, days filled with press interrogation and publicity and concluded that taking the time to himself while he could sound the most tolerable. Especially given his more distracted state of mind.

Ren lived little ways outside of the city. The band toured so often he didn’t find much of a reason to spend the money residing in the heart of downtown. He had an absolutely suitable place for a bachelor who was rarely home, and he hadn’t any issues with it until he opened his door today.

For the first time, he realized how empty it was. Bare minimum everything. No color, no life, just the basic needs for standard living. It was lonely.

He shook his head, trying to think of anything else besides _her_. How had three days led to this? He had never been in the best head space when it came to social bonds. He usually had the ability to detach himself. He needed to clear his head.

First, he slumped onto the couch. Burying his face into the cushions, and legs sticking out over the armrest. He sighed and rolled onto the floor, finding that slightly more suitable. The biggest problem with having such a bare apartment was that there was very little to entertain himself with. He thought of making some food, but he wasn’t hungry. He could try sleeping, reading, maybe something productive like writing music.

Showering was probably not the best idea, as he found it very hard not to think about _that_  with steaming hot water gliding down his bare body. Such impulses were beneath him. _Beneath_ … him. He shook his head violently trying to get the accompanying visuals out of his skull. Certainly, he wasn't against allowing himself such pleasures from time to time, but there was something more deviant and guilt-ridden about it when he had someone so particular in mind. Someone he knew and who had no say in how he thought about her. Faceless women who had no meaning were easy to imagine, but she… she was real and beautiful and perfect. She would think he was disgusting for this.

His hand ‘accidentally’ brushed against himself and he let out a soft groan. He let his hand linger there as he fought these urges and the imagery that came with it. She would look so beautiful if she were there with him, wet, in more ways than one, pressed against him. Kissing him. Touching him. His mind and hand were out of his control at this point and he cursed under his breath.

Her mouth could be around him, moving slowly, teasing. He grunted and threw his fist against the shower wall, leaning his forehead against it as well.

“Fuck.”

When he came it wasn’t filled with the satisfaction he would have liked, if anything it just amplified any desires to know what it would feel like. With her. He slammed off the shower and continued to lean there. She would think he was disgusting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> http://inexorably-drawn-to-you.tumblr.com/


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All, after all that It's a [Parent} Trap grinding, it's nice to write something so casually.  
> This is my cool down fic after all. 
> 
> http://inexorably-drawn-to-you.tumblr.com/

“Rey,” she awakened suddenly, “Rey, my dear, what are you doing?”

Her heart dropped when it wasn’t Poe’s voice that was waking her. She rolled out from under the desk and hopped up as quickly as she could to try to act like she hadn't been there long.

“Just got to work early, ma’am! I must have fallen asleep while… cleaning under this desk.” She was a horrible liar.

“Child, I know some pretty terrible liars and sadly for you, you are among those ranks.” She folded her arms and looked at Rey expectantly, “so, you can either stick to your story or tell me that you’ve been sleeping here.”

“That also may have been what happened,” she covered her face in humiliation, “I’m so sorry, I swear I don’t do this often, I usually stay with Finn or Poe, but I didn't want to inconvenience them for awhile.”

“Rey, I've offered you a room," she wasn't quite angry but Rey felt terrified. "You are staying with me,” she continued, intending no further questions to be asked asked, “I have a spare bedroom, you will have your own space, you won’t inconvenience me at all.”

“I…I couldn’t," she tried to argue, knowing it to be useless.

“You don’t have a choice in the matter,” Leia leaned in and took in a sharp sniff, “how long has it been since you showered?”

“I’ve gone longer,” Rey lifted her shirt slightly to smell herself, the embarrassment becoming her.

“Come on. We are going now. You shouldn't be in a professional setting like this.” Leia turned towards the door and Rey hopped to follow.

“But the day just started, don’t bother yourself because of me!” she joined her at her side and Leia nodded to greet her employees as she passed them.

“Trust me. I never turn down an excuse to get out of this building, even if it’s not necessarily productive.” She smirked, pushing Rey out the front door as quickly as they could, “now, hurry up before someone stops us.”

They circled the building to the parking garage in the back. Leia’s car had a reserved spot on the bottom floor and the two hopped in and took off without anyone noticing. Rey smiled as she played along to Leia’s escape.

“I don’t live too far, just outside of the city,” Leia began, “I’ll show you around and then you can have the place to yourself, play hooky today, I think you’ve earned it.”

“Leia-“ she protested, but the woman shot her a glance.

“You need to take care of yourself, Rey,” she started, “you don’t need to fight people wanting to take care of you, we all know you can take care of yourself, so just let others make it easier from time to time.”

Rey nodded. She knew this was a fault of hers, a fault that had bothered Finn and Poe relentlessly.

Leia’s home was far more modest than what Rey was expecting. It was wall to wall white, with minimal decoration and furnishing. A few photos hung on the walls, mostly records from the past. It was simple. Far more simple than to be expected of a president of a world renown music label.

Leia set her bag down on a barstool near the entryway and turned to Rey with open arms. “Welcome,” she greeted, almost like she hadn’t seen Rey all day, let alone had just driven in a car with her for the last twenty minutes.

“You have a lovely home,” Rey started, bare as it was, it was still cleanly and comforting. Rey clutched to her bag tightly and waited for further instructions from Leia.

“No need to lie, it’s pretty empty,” she laughed, “the job comes with so much travel, I never found much time to redecorate.” Leia turned and waved Rey over, she jumped to the woman’s side and followed.

“Now, the room you are staying in is technically my son's, but saying he hasn’t set foot in it in six years... if he came crawling back you have every right to kick him out, but I guess I don’t need to tell you that!”

Rey didn’t know her boss had a son, to be honest. She had never mentioned him, nor did anybody at work. She couldn’t imagine Leia with a son if she was truthful, she was a nurturing woman, that was for sure, but a mother was a different story.

Leia led them up a small spiral staircase that opened directly to the room in which she spoke. “My apologies in advanced, I don’t come up here very often,” She said as she flipped the light switch. The room, like the rest of the house, was impeccably clean, but unlike the remainder of the house, it was covered in wall to wall black, aside from the red accented walls.

The filled bookshelves and dressers were lightly dusted, but it was nothing Rey wasn't already used too. Despite not being lived in for six years it was cleanlier than Poe’s place for sure, and it was a hell of a lot better than sleeping under an office desk.

“Really Leia, this is more than enough!” she said, reluctantly placing her bag down onto the bed. The room was rather dark, she thought, assuming her son probably had gone through some punk phase before he had moved out.

“Please, you are doing me a favor,” Leia finally admitted, her tone getting a little more sullen, “it get’s kinda lonely around here, it’ll be nice having someone around!” The two of them begin their trek back down the stairs where Leia began the rest of her tour. She pointed out the bathroom at the end of the hall, the master bedroom which was on the other side of the living area, and most importantly the kitchen in which Leia had insisted Rey could eat whatever she wanted.

Rey hadn’t really taken the time to examine the decor until then, the hung metallic records labeled with famous artists from the years. But on a glass table near the entryway, there was a line of framed photographs. She glossed over them until she reached one of Leia and a small child, a boy, probably around 12.

“He- he looks familiar,” Rey said, intending for it to stay a thought, but Leia overheard.

“I guess he looks a little different without the swollen eye,” the woman laughed, “that and the fact he’s actually shorter than me there, it’s hard to believe he was ever small looking at him now, I don’t know where he got his height from cause it certainly wasn’t from me.” Rey’s heart sunk to the bottom of her stomach. Surely it couldn't be... there was no possible way.

“I can’t believe this is your... son,” She muttered, still slightly paralyzed from the revelation. Her son was Kylo Ren.

“I know, right?” She joined Rey at her side, picking up the frame, “he likes to pretend he’s always been so dark and shrouded in mystery, but I have a thousand photos to prove that he wasn’t.” She rolled her eyes slightly, “If I were a worse mother I would leak them to the media, trust me, I’ve considered it just to try to get the boy to call me.”

The boy in the photo was smiling from ear to ear, ears that stuck out from under his short dark hair. He was wearing a blue button up shirt, that was tucked into khaki shorts, and for lack of a better term... he looked like an absolute dork. Rey almost gained her composure long enough to smile at the image before all the puzzle pieces came together and it dawned on her that she had punched her bosses son in the face.

“Leia!” She said so suddenly that the woman almost dropped the frame, “I”m so sorry I hit your son!” 

“I’ve already told you, it's alright, the kid deserves a wake-up call.” She walked back over to the stool in which she’d placed her bag and picked it up with an exasperated sigh. “I guess I should head back now, but please, shower, sleep, eat.”

Rey tilted her head back towards the bathroom and agreed to the suggestions wholeheartedly. She thanked Leia again for the hospitality and watched as the door slowly closed behind her. As soon as she heard the door lock she picked up the photo herself.

“Shit,” she cursed under her breath. Leia hadn’t seemed upset at her, but she also obviously had no idea that Rey didn’t know. Did Poe know? Did Finn? Was everyone just waiting for this to explode in her face? While she went back up to his room to grab her phone, the whole area suddenly seemed contaminated. She dialed Poe’s number and paced as it connected.

“Yello,’” he said.

“You son of a bitch.” Rey snapped without much thought.

“Okay, what did I do now?” He laughed, not taking her tone too seriously.

“Did you know that Kylo Ren was Leia’s son? Starkiller Kylo Ren.”

“Ah, so Finn owes me ten bucks.” Poe was still laughing, and Rey could feel her face growing hot. “I knew you didn’t know.”

“Why did everyone think I knew? No one ever talks about it!” She sat down on the bed for a brief moment, but then upon realizing whose bed it was she popped back up with a shudder.

“Well, it kinda seemed like you targeted him in particular, and that would make sense cause Starkiller screwed us over, and well, Ren has screwed his whole family over. But I knew you didn’t know. There’s no way you would have punched him if you did. Let alone have gone on a date with the guy.”

Rey felt her heart stop, and not for the first time that day. “What?”

“Seriously Rey, keep up with the publicity stunts, at this rate we will have our tour in no time, we'll just bypass the whole opening act stage!” Poe didn't seem angry, he was teasing, but Rey wanted to jump down his throat and rip it out.

“What are you talking about?” She accused.

“Not a lot of news sources have picked it up luckily, more people are talking about the New Republic breakup, but you looked so cute on your little date. The one with you in his sunglasses is especially endearing.” She heard clicking through the phone, and Poe was obviously scrolling through the images now.

“It wasn’t a date,” she snarled, “we were just making amends from the other night!”

“Oh and this one, when his hand is on your back, you’re blushing!” He was ridiculing her at this point and Rey was seconds away from hanging up and chucking her phone out the window.

“It was cold outside.” Rey objected, even though she couldn't see the photo.

“Don’t worry, kid. I’ll do damage control for you.” Poe finally stopped poking at her, and his tone became a bit sweeter, “Leia might not even see it.”

“I’m staying at her house, Poe! She can’t see it!”

“But it wasn’t a date,” Poe stated.

“No.” She agreed.

“Then that’s what you’ll tell her. If it really wasn’t a date.”

He had a point. She hadn’t done anything wrong aside from trying to save face with the press, which is what Leia had told her to do in the first place. If she said that all of this would blow over and she would still have a place to sleep. Then why did she feel so guilty?

“It’s wasn't a date,” she shook her head.

“Then if Leia asks, that’s what I’ll tell her,” he repeated one last time, she could hear him chuckle lightly through the line, “don’t worry, I’ve got you covered.”

The call ended and she flopped onto the floor, still not quite ready to be in his bed. The thought pooled hot in her stomach and she flinched. Her phone buzzed once more and it’s a text from Poe, she opened it to find one of the pictures that had been taken from the day prior.

Poe was right. She was blushing. Her eyes were wide and her lips folded into her mouth. She could see the ends of his fingers curling out from her back and she felt the ghost of his touch against her again. She could blame the cold all she wanted, but it would have been a blatant lie.  

She threw her phone aside and slammed her hands against her face. With a loud groan, she made it to her feet and decided that a shower to clear her head, and the grime, is probably the best idea. She headed towards the staircase after quickly running back to snag her phone. As she made it to the living area she had one last detour before the shower and stood back in front of that framed photo. Rey opened her phone's camera and snapped a preview of it.

She thought of sending it to Poe or Finn, and surely they would get a laugh out of it. But then she found herself opening her e-mail and the last message she’d received from him. She attached the file in the reply and added a caption.

_I know all your secrets -__-_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Awkward.  
> Rey has accepted Leia's invitation and may or may not regret things. She doesn't even know.

When her skin had finally felt clean, for the first time in what seemed like forever, she hopped out of the shower and wrapped herself in a towel. She groaned as it was upon that action that she realized she didn’t have a change of clothes with her and peaked out of the bathroom door to make sure Leia hadn’t come back and the house was still empty. With a deep breath, she dashed out of the bathroom towards the stairs and worked her way to the top, leaving small droplets of water behind her. She dug through her messenger bag for hopefully a somewhat clean t-shirt, and she had no luck as everything she pulled out had the same distinct odor.

With an exasperated sigh, she dumped the remaining contents of her bag onto the floor in one final attempt to find something clean. No such success. Leia _had_ pointed out a washing machine, thankfully, on the main level, and she scooped up her clothing in her arms, holding tight to the towel around her for modesty’s sake, and made her way back down the spiral.

After setting everything on the right mode, and with a click of a button, she began the cycle and ran to snag her phone from the bathroom.

He had replied. Replied no less than four times and Rey laughed at his urgency before even opening the messages.

 _‘Oh God.’_ was all the first message said.

 _‘Where are you? Did my mother show you that?’_ was the next.

_‘Wait are you at my house?’_

_‘Or her house, I mean. Ah, talking over e-mail like it’s the 90’s is a pain, just take my number…’_

Rey felt her heart jump at the digits. A part of her wanted to ignore it, but another part was having fun with these exchanges. She took a leap of faith and saved the number, knowing she didn’t have to give him hers if she didn’t want too. As soon as the contact information was saved, there was an urgent knock on the door and Rey became very aware that she was still only in a towel with all of her clothes in the wash.

“One moment!” She shouted out before she realized she should have just ignored it. She cursed as she sprung up the stairs to see if she happened to leave any of her clothes sprawled out on the floor. The knocking didn’t continue, so she had hoped, by some miracle, they had just left. Throwing all self-worth aside, she opened one of _his_ dresser drawers that were still partially filled and nabbed a large t-shirt from it. She threw it over her head and made sure it hung low enough for it to be somewhat acceptable. Looking down she examined the print on the front that read “The Journey of Acolytes”, she was unfamiliar with the term and she didn’t think any further of it.  She darted to the front door and opened it just the tiniest of slivers.

At that moment she had wished with every fiber of her being that she had just kept that towel on, for the person she was looking at was the one person on the entire planet she would be more humiliated with by wearing this particular t-shirt.

“Shit” she whispered.

“So, you are at my mother's house,” the dark voice replied. Waiting for her to open the door further.

“To be fair, I didn’t know this was your mother's house!” She bit back. He cocked his head in his confusion.

“Is this a random break in or something? You just happened to break into your bosses house?”

So, _everyone_ thought she knew. “No, I actually just didn’t know she was your mother until about an hour ago.”

“Are you kidding?” He seemed maybe a bit disheartened.

“Not at all. Trust me. I wouldn’t have hit you if I knew.” 

“I thought part of the reason was _because_ you knew,” he smirked, beginning to push on his side of the door to make his way in. She fought him on this so it was only open just that small crack.

“You can’t come in!” She protested, “I’m not wearing anything, I just got out of the shower.”

He turned twenty shades of red at that moment and furrowed his brow, “You answered the door, to a house that wasn’t yours, without any clothing on?”

“Well, I’m wearing something... just… all my clothes were in the wash, so… I just had to throw something on,” she sputtered, “just let me change into something else.”

Rey went to shut the door and run off but she hadn’t realized that he had managed to stick his foot in the opening to prevent it from closing all the way. It bounced off his shoe and just as she was turning away the door was wide open. When she faced him again she’s never seen a man look so smug in her whole life. Rey would have given anything to be back in that damn towel.

“That’s mine.”

“I needed something to open the door in. Calm down.” She began to make her way back to the stairs. “Plus, your mother said you hadn't been back here in what, six years?”

“Well, you’ve never been here before.” he smiled, then his face dropped and he coughed to try to explain himself, “I mean, it makes more sense for me to be here than you.” It was painfully obvious that he was starring as she took a few steps up.

With that she became entirely self-aware that she was climbing stairs without any sort of undergarment and stopped in mid step. “Turn around!” The man’s daze was broken and he snapped to attention.

“What?”

“Just… turn around while I’m going upstairs.”

“W-Why? Are… you.. are you…?” his stoic nature was breaking by the second, it would have been almost endearing if her embarrassment hadn't totally engulfed her.

“Just shut up and turn around.” He did as she asked and she made it up to his room, upon doing so concluding that this still didn’t solve her problem of not having clothes. She took a deep breath and yelled back down to the main level, “Okay, I have nothing to wear, can you just suck it up not patronize me until my clothes are finished?”

She just heard an amused chuckle come from the bottom floor, and she took that as a ‘ _no_ ’ on the whole ‘ _not patronize_ ’ thing. With a sigh she returned down the stairs, holding the shirt in place, even though it almost hit her knees just to make sure it didn’t bounce up. He was still turned in the opposite direction and she tapped him on the shoulder.

“What are you doing here anyway?”

“Haven’t been home in awhile, you just reminded me of that.” He turned towards the table with the photos and slammed the one that had him in it face down against the glass. “Plus I needed to destroy that.”

“Don’t do that,” she lifted the photo back up, “it makes your mother happy.”

“Well, if it wasn’t clear by now, my mother and I don’t necessarily see eye to eye a lot.” He didn’t move the photo again though. He bypassed Rey into the living area and plopped down on the couch like he had never left. “She’s at work, right?”

“No, she’s here, in her room-“ Rey started to joke, but the sheer terror on his face made her clarify immediately, “I’m joking, she’s at work.”

He relaxed again. If he was that uneasy about seeing the woman, why did he even come back? She thought back to those paparazzi photos and tried to shake the thought out of her head. But she wasn’t as dense as she would have liked to be at that moment, he was here to see her.

“So, I had a question… about yesterday…” Rey began as he swung his feet up onto the coffee table, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Oh yeah!” he perked up, “That’s why I’m technically here, you owe me lunch!”

She rolled her eyes. “Really, could barely wait twenty-four hours to take that up?”

“Free food is free food.”

“Okay, well, heads up, I’ve got a grand total of twenty-two dollars in cash, so be prepared for some quality eats.” she retorted, but he just laughed.

“Then we won’t go out.” He looked so damned cocky she was tempted to touch up his fading bruise, but then he turned to her and said, “I’m sure there is something here I can eat.”

Her face in the following seconds had turned such a dark red she could feel the heat radiating off of it.

Ren cocked his head in confusion, but in a flash, his eyes grew wide and his mouth dropped open a bit as he sputtered. “No! That’s not what I meant! I’m sorry!”

“I know, I know!” Rey assured in a panic because it was true. It was just hard not to think that when she felt half naked.

“I wouldn’t… I mean, I would, but I wouldn’t say it like that!” His hands fumbled as he tried to explain, “not that…I am not trying… but… I didn’t mean…”

“Dear Lord, please just stop talking!” She interrupted over his nonsensical stammering, and as if it were a thoughtful gift from the heavens the laundry turned off with a signaling buzz. “Oh thank god!” She dashed to the machine and dug through the damp clothing for something to wear. She found a pair of underwear and a bra and locked herself in the bathroom to slide them on. She shivered as the still wet cloth brushed her skin, but was thankful that a different level of discomfort had been deterred. When she left the room, she brought her remaining laundry to the dryer and started the cycle. His voice became apparent from around the corner.

“Aren’t the clothes you put on still wet?”

She came out from the small alcove where the laundry and the bathroom were into full view.

“Trust me, wet under garments are the least of worries.” She scoffed as she watched his face become flushed once again. She dragged her hands down her face with an embarrassed groan when the innuendo was realized, “Okay, that one was my fault.”

Without another word she made her way to the kitchen, mostly just to avoid further conversation and not just to appease his request for food. She couldn’t help but notice how hot her face felt and cursed herself for even letting this strange series of events to happen. Opening up a few cupboards to try to locate items that were edible she pulled out whatever she found that she assumed Leia wouldn’t mind if she took. Some chips, a couple of slices of bread, a few pieces or fruit, and some luncheon meat from the fridge.

“Now, don’t get used to this,” she yelled from over the counter as she placed the slices of bread down on paper plates, “but all I know is how to make sandwiches, so that is what you are getting!” She turned around and was startled to find he was standing a few feet behind her leaning against a counter.

“I can make something,” he murmured, avoided eye contact ever so slightly.

“No way, then I still owe you.”

He took a step forward and leaned over her as he reached into an open cupboard. Rey was a statue as his chest was far to close to her face for her liking. He returned and backed away with an armful of food and tossed it down on the table, and Rey furrowed her brow as she examined what he had gathered and scoffed at the sight of packaged noodles.

“Okay, knowing how to make Ramen isn’t much of an improvement from a sandwich.”

“No, trust me, it’s good,” he defended as she took noticed in the other incidents, a can of sliced tomatoes and corn, some seasonings, and lastly he grabbed some frozen meat from the fridge.

“Okay…” she hesitated as he made his way to the stove, turning the switch to ignite the small flame.

After twenty minutes of confused observation as he worked and a splash of disbelief, she came to the discovery that what he said was true. It was magnificent. There was nothing special about how it was prepared. It was just the ingredients thrown together in a pan and came out as a savory masterpiece.

Rey looked down at her empty plate after her final helping in grief. The two sat on either end of the living room couch as he still took forkfuls of his half-finished meal. Rey almost tried to scheme of how she could switch plates without him noticing.

“See, I told you.” He smirked when he looked up and saw her eyeing his food. She’d already had three servings and practically licked the pan clean.

“I only slightly doubted you.” She said as she set the empty plate on the coffee table before her. He chuckled in a way that made him sound so dastardly human. It made her smile.

From outside the front door something shuffled, it was a faint noise but Rey supposed it could have sounded like someone dropping off a newspaper, or a small animal of sorts, but from Ren’s reaction she swore he thought it was an all out attack.

He jumped up from his place on the couch and though he looked like he wanted to run, he was frozen in place, unsure of where to go. The noise subsided into nothingness, but he still stared in a panic waiting for the worst to come.

“Thought it was your mom?” Rey assumed, taking this opportunity to stick a fork in his left plate.

“Ugh, maybe,” he groaned, but slightly grinning as he looked back towards Rey who had been caught red-handed thieving from him.

“Why are you so afraid of seeing her?” she muttered with a full mouth, not caring too much that he noticed.

“I…” he paused, and Rey felt a wave of guilt wash over her as she’d probably pried too deeply. “I don’t know really,” he stammered.

Rey expected him to sit again but he didn’t. He headed back to the entryway and grabbed his jacket and slid on his shoes.

“Thanks for lunch,” he said quickly.

“Don’t thank me. You did everything!” She tried laughing to lighten the moment but he was far too distracted at the moment.

“Uh, just don’t tell her I came by if that’s alright.” He slid on an arm of his coat, followed by the other, “I shouldn’t have come here at all, so… if you don’t mind.”

“I won’t tell her,” Rey assured. Though her loyalties were to Leia, she figured this situation would distress her as well, and it was best-kept secret for now.

“Thank you.” He looked to her one last time before placing his hand on the doorknob, “I’ll… see you.”

“Your eye looks a little better,” Rey added as the door cracked open. He chuckled again and without another word he was gone. She sat there a few moments, just processing the last hour of events. Though she wished she was, she wasn’t an idiot when it came to these things.

But she was still hungry, and she grabbed his abandoned plate and another forkful.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay! Updates for this and It's a Parent Trap should be a little more frequent now!


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How does time go so quickly? I swear I updated this two weeks ago and now its been a month? I'm so sorry!

 “I think he _likes_ me.” Rey blurted out the following day, with a mouthful of food at a cheap diner table, joined by her friends.  Leia insisted that Rey take another day to herself instead of coming to the office, but she had been going a bit stir crazy in that empty house and nearly demanded Finn and Poe meet her for lunch down the block from the studio.  If only because she desperately needed to talk about the strange series of events unfolding before her.

“No shit,”Poe said as bluntly as possible, accompanied by a roll of his eyes.

The waitress came by and they all quieted as she refilled their drinks.She raised an eyebrow at them suspiciously but turned away.

“I don’t get it, I didn’t exactly make the best first impression, and suddenly I think we’ve been on like two dates,”Rey said in an almost whisper once she was sure they weren’t being heard again. 

“I thought it wasn’t a date…” Poe smirked, and Finn nudged his side. 

“I didn’t think it was until after he left yesterday!Honestly!”Mostly true. 

“He’s a weird dude, Rey,” Finn scoffed, pointing at her with his fork, “I mean, boss’s son or not, he’s an off guy, I think that’s fair to say. I didn’t work too closely with him when I was signed with the _First Order_ , but I was certainly close enough to know that he’s chucked a fair share of chairs at a fair share of walls.”

“Probably some sort of masochist to be honest,” Poe laughed and Rey hid her face into her hands. “So while you thought punching him was sending some kind of message… it turns out it just turned him on."

“Stop it!” Rey groaned, her face unbearably flushed. Poe reached over and pinched her cheek.

“Look at you, getting all embarrassed!” Rey swatted his hand away and both the boys across from her chuckled.“it’s cute, I’ve never seen you with a crush before!”

Finn’s face dropped slightly and he cocked his head, “Wait? Crush!”

“No!” She exclaimed, “It’s not like that, plus he’s Leia’s son!”  
  
“And a certified crazy person.”Finn continued,“Seriously, have you heard any of the stories?”  
  
“Obviously not, I didn’t know he was Leia’s son until yesterday, no one at work talks about him!”  
  
“It’s because he’s Leia’s kid, and a bit of an embarrassment, that no one mentions him. She’s still trying to make amends but he’s avoiding her like the plague and acts like a childabout it.”

“What on earth happened?” Rey said, expecting the answer to be one more of lighthearted gossip rather than what she was about to get.Poe and Finn exchanged nervous glances and Poe took the reigns. 

“I’m not sure if I’m the best person to tell you this, and I don’t know the full story,” he started, looking at Rey waiting for her confirmation to continue, with a slight nod he did so, “It’s really not my place, but Leia’s husband passed away 5 or 6 years ago.  It was very sudden, car accident. Ren was in the car.  What happened from there is just office gossip, but it’s pretty easy to guess.”

“He had just signed with the First Order when it happened too, that’s the only reason I heard about it, no one has spoken a word of it to me since we signed with Leia.” 

“Oh.”Rey looked down solemnly, a bit guilty that she had pried too much.

“Yeah, so he’s off, but I guess I can’t fault him too much,”Poe finished, toying with the last few bites of his salad on his plate. 

“I didn’t know about Leia’s husband,” Rey suddenly lost her appetite, a rare happening, and she set down her utensils. 

“It was a long time before you even came to the city, there was no reason for you to know.” 

“We don’t have to talk about this... or him,”Rey concluded, looking down at her hands, regretting bringing up the subject of Ren in the first place. 

“No… but I guess we can watch it.”Poe gestured with his fork up at the TV screen behind Rey. 

She turned around and surely enough on that screen, standing in a black peacoat, glaring at the flashing lights was the man of the hour. He was with the same two bandmates Rey had seen alongside him the night of the incident. Ren was now hiding behind them as best he could. The red-haired man had clearly taken a prideful lead on whatever was being discussed.The television volume wasn’t loud enough the hear over the restaurant chatter, but Rey squinted to try to make out the words on the ticker bar scrolling on the bottom of the screen. 

_‘LIVE NOW: STARKILLER DISCUSSES NEW REPUBLIC AND NEW MEMBER’_

Rey glared out of obligation, but for some reason it hadn’t angered her like she thought it would.The red-haired ring leader gestured with sophistication, Ren’s eyes darted around the audience before them, digging his hands into his pockets, the blonde woman just glared intimidatingly directly into the camera.

Suddenly Ren startled ever so slightly, looking down at his pocketed hands, pulling the right one out, phone in possession. He tried hiding the phone from view by keeping it close to him and dragged his finger across the screen to activate it.Then he smiled. Fully smiled at whatever message he just saw and for some reason, Rey felt herself become uneasy about that and her eyes dropped down from the screen. 

Then she heard a low soft chuckle from Poe, some interjection from Finn, and she snapped back to attention.Turning to face the two boys who stared intently. 

“What?”

Finn frowned and rolled his eyes, then pointed a thumb at Poe who was holding up Rey’s cell phone teasingly.

Her heart stopped. “What did you do?”

“Nothing, I promise!” He lied.The phone buzzed in his hands and Rey lurched towards him. 

“What did you do!?” She repeated with more urgency.   
  
He pointed back towards the TV screen with the phone, “just wanted to see it for myself.” 

Rey turned back towards the television to see Ren was still intently looking at his phone, fidgeting almost nervously with it, chewing on his lip. Either a manager, or publicist’s hand came into frame and gestured to tell him to put the object away, he furrowed his brow but obeyed.

“What did you say?!” She felt like she was 20 shades of red and 20 levels too loud. 

He resided and slid the phone back to her.She fumbled with it as she opened the message log and her eyes grew wide. 

_‘Hey, it’s Rey, what are you doing tonight?’_ She’d never been angrier at the man before her than right now.

“You asked him out?!”Her heart thudded. 

“I just asked a simple question,” he shrugged, not taking her anger too seriously.

_‘Publicity garbage, I’ve got an open evening Monday though, what’s up?.’_ was the reply that had come through a few moments prior. 

“Now what do I do?” Rey groaned, “Poe, what the hell?”

“But did you see him? He was so happy!”Poe mocked looking back up at the TV. Finn folded over into his hands. 

“Man, you shouldn’t egg him on,” Finn muttered. “He’s obsessive, dude, I wouldn’t be surprised if he already has some shrine built for her.”

“What do you mean?” Rey cocked her head.

“I keep telling you, he’s not all there, a ticking time bomb.He obsesses over the things he wants. Then the second something goes wrong another chair is gone through the third story window.”

“So, he's had a lot of…” she stumbled on the words, she wasn’t interested in filling the position, but couldn’t help but to wonder, “love…problems?”

“I never saw him with a girlfriend or anything, more directions with the band and the label, but he always kept his personal life to himself.”   
  
A small wave of relief hit her. She hated herself for it and shook it out of her head.She didn’t care if he went through partners like mints or not.

“What do I tell him?” She looked back down at her phone.

“Just say you are busy, Rey,” Poe crossed his arms and sat back in his chair. “If you really don’t care about the whole thing.”

“I’m just… not a good liar.”

“Sure, Rey.” 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> http://inexorably-drawn-to-you.tumblr.com/


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's a date. Maybe. Kind of.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bunch a nerds.

She didn’t respond.He didn’t pry.

She found herself almost wishing he did.  

Every time her phone buzzed she’d furrow her brow at the sight of Finn or Poe’s name as it popped up on screen. Poe was doing it on purpose at this point and she knew it.The phone would buzz, she’d frown at his name, and Poe would coyly smirk back when Rey glared at him from across the office. 

It was Monday.She found herself opening their message log just in case she had missed anything.She hadn’t. Even though she had been the one not to respond in the first place, it frustrated her. He’d probably moved on to some new muse, someone a bit easier to obtain.

_Pig._

She rolled her eyes at the fictitious scene that played before her, some voluptuous groupie who didn’t even want him, just wanted to say that she had him.Not that Rey wanted him either, but, as shallow as it sounded, she found comfort in telling herself she enjoyed the attention.Though their story had it’s sharp edges, she admired his willingness to help her, even if it wasn’t warranted. Maybe a part of her liked feeling fascinating to someone.

Rey’s entire semi-adult life had been spent feeling more like a conquest than a person when it came to romance. No, romance wasn’t the right word when it came to those experiences.None of those encounters had been romantic. Rey had blamed herself for some time, knowing her desperation for a connection with someone had clouded her judgment. Perhaps this was all it was again.She was another conquest to him, and he didn’t care enough to be persistent.  
  
But this wasn’t high school where his options were limited. He could step outside and find someone else. 

As her mind raced while tapping a pen against her desk, her phone buzzed again.She glared up at Poe who was mindlessly scrolling down his computer screen. He had been claiming he'd been working on making connections and networking while he was here, but given his confused look, she was sure he was doing nothing of the sort. 

_‘Hey, you free tonight?’  
__  
_ Her face turned red and that _damned_ heart of hers pounded. She looked back towards the window and it was nearly dark. She tossed her phone around in her hands for a few moments before Poe snapped out of his half-drooling gaze.

“It’s him isn’t it?” 

Rey only nodded.

“And you didn’t text him back before this?”

“Nope,” she popped her ‘p.'Still fumbling with the phone.

“Then Finn owes me another ten bucks, poor bastard.”Poe cheekily smiled over at Finn’s desk who was blissfully unaware of the situation.“I knew he’d cave.”

“Cave?”Rey asked. 

“He’s playing the game just as much as you are, dear,” he paused as Rey looked down at the message again, “you just don’t want to admit that you are playing.”

“I just don’t know what to do. I was hoping that if I ignored it this whole thing would go away.”  
  
“Please Rey, is that why every time your phone buzzed for the last few days you jump out of your seat?Is that why you frown ever so slightly when it’s not him?”  
  
“Poe, don’t press me on this.”

“Fine.”He never took her threats too seriously, because he knew he was right.Always. _Damn him._

_‘Yeah, I’m still at work though.’_ She finally replied, hoping Poe hadn’t noticed her typing.He did. 

The response was nearly immediate. _‘Perfect, meet me around the corner,by Monument Plaza,’_

Rey scoffed in her seat as she typed back, _‘I can’t just leave work.'_ Honestly, she could, she had no obligation to be here, she only came in to show face and maybe send a few e-mails, but she couldn’t let him know that.

_‘No worries, I’ll wait,'   w_as not the response she expected, but it was the one she got.She stared at the message for a few moments and found herself slowly scooting out of her chair, grabbing her messenger bag off the floor. 

“Where ya going?”Poe smiled.

“Home to Leia’s, nothing to do anyway.”Rey returned the smile for there was no use, they both knew she was lying. 

“Well, I hope you find something to do,”Poe finished, and Rey chucked a pen at him as she stormed off.

She crossed Finn’s desk who was nodding along to a phone conversation and she jumped in his line of sight to say goodbye.He waved with a grin and she pulled on her coat and left the building.

A sudden weird sensation came over her as she headed down the street.Rey had never been one to feel self-conscious about her physical appearance.Her makeup was routine, a coat of mascara, maybe some cover-up or blush, but never anything too elaborate and her clothing was boyish and Ill fitting, but comfortable.  And now a wave of nervousness rushed over her as she approached the plaza. 

She never told him she was on her way. Maybe she could run somewhere and…

“Rey?”

_Shit._

“Didn't take you long to get out of work.”He was in the same black peacoat as the other day on TV.His eye was almost entirely healed.Maybe just a little yellow.He had probably worn some makeup during the press conferences the other day.

“I hadn’t much to do anyway,” she sighed.“How long have you been out here anyway?”

“Not too long, I just figured we could go see a movie or something, and this was the closest one.” His red cheeks and nose had implied otherwise.  
  
“So you were just assuming I’d say I was free?” She cocked an eyebrow playfully.

“Hey, you asked me first,” he argued. 

_But it wasn’t her._ A part of her wanted to say that so she could win this quip, but she kept quiet, folding her arms into her sides in the brisk weather.

“So, a movie, huh?” She changed the subject.

“Yeah, if that works for you,”Rey just stared at him for a moment, he was so heartfelt about this whole endeavor.He jolted slightly at her confused expression and continued, “or we could do something else, dinner, or just walk around…”  
  
“No, a movie sounds great! I want to get out of the cold.”She pushed him back a few steps so they began the short trek towards the cinema, and she found herself unable to speak more than a few words in reply to whatever he was saying.Instead, she just watched his pocketed hands, wondering if she walked close enough…

“Rey, did you hear me?” The man repeated, and Rey looked up. 

“I’m sorry, I must have zoned out.” she laughed nervously.  
  
“I’m already boring you?”He nudged her slightly with a small smirk. _That wasn’t it at all._ “Anything, in particular, you wanted to see?”

“Um, not really…” She looked up to the oncoming theater marquis and the titles it had listed.Nothing was particularly appealing.

“How about ‘ _King of Gunga_ ’?” He said as they approached the ticket booth

“That is supposed to be _horrible_ ,” Rey argued.

“I know.”  Without another word he slid a bill to the cashier, who was blinking at him, cautiously trying to figure out why he looked so familiar.She slid him two tickets in return and he tossed one to Rey.“But then we can make fun of it the whole time, and the theater won’t be too crowded.” 

“I could have paid for my ticket!” she protested.

“It’s no problem. It’s a -“ he stopped himself before completing the sentence. “I’m not gonna have you pay for a movie you are going to hate when it’s my idea.”

“Fair enough, I guess.” 

He put his hand on her back in the same fashion as he had done before.A familiar warmth filled her again as she tried so desperately to push these feelings down.She could admit to herself that she may have been shallow enough to like the idea of being _liked_ but reciprocating was not part of this plan. 

“Popcorn?” 

“Do you even have to ask,” she grinned after a long whiff, the pleasant scent filling the air as Rey bathed in it. 

He chuckled lowly and she stared again. 

“But I can pay for it!” She added as he stepped up to the counter. 

“Just let me pay for tonight, it’s my turn anyway.” he opened his wallet after telling the concessions worker his order. 

“Last time didn’t really count for me.You did everything.”  
  
“It counted.” He handed Rey the filled tub and began walking away. She shoved a handful into her mouth and scrambled to catch up.

“Thanks” She muttered through the kernels. 

After their ticket stubs had been ripped and returned to them, the two shuffled nervously into the nearly empty theater.Ren was right about that.There was a couple sitting in the back who seemed pretty displeased that two more people were about the join their show, but other than that… bare. 

He picked the seats with a metal bar in front of them and immediately slung his long legs over it, slouching down in the seat like a child.A child who hadn’t realized he was far too big to do that.Rey felt herself relax as this was obviously not an attempt at seduction. 

“You look ridiculous.” Rey murmured with a smile as she sat next to him, putting the giant tub of popcorn in her lap.

“I look comfortable.”He smirked, reaching over to grab a single kernel and popping it into his mouth.“You try sitting in any damn chair being my height.” 

_That must be why so many of them get thrown through walls,_ Rey thought to herself.She made herself giggle, and he looked over. 

“What?” He said and Rey met his glance. He was so low down in his chair that they seemed to be eye level for the first time.It was unsettling.She could feel her eyes drift to parts of his face that she really hoped not to notice too much, and before it became too obvious she shot her stare back at the screen before them. 

“Shh…” she covered, “Movies about to start.”

Every review of this film kept its promise.It was a disaster.The acting was forced, the characters had no chemistry, and the dialog was laughable… which proved to be the best part of the film because they spent most of the movie convulsing trying to keep their laughter silent for the sake of the other two movie goers. 

Then he leaned over, and the atmosphere changed.His breath was hot on her ear and Rey felt her skin tighten.She couldn’t even focus enough to hear what he had said but she forced a short exhale of a laugh as he pulled away.She wasn’t even sure he'd intended to say anything funny. Rey looked over to see if her response had confused him in any way but his eyes had focused back on the screen. 

She kept her hands busy by eating way too much popcorn.Ren’s were either hanging off the armrest or somewhere in his hair. He did that a lot.She wasn’t sure if it was a nervous habit or if he was just pulling it out of his face, but whatever reason, it was working. _He had really nice hair._  

She couldn’t deny she found him cute like this. Dastardly human.The way he hid his ears with his hair, the nose that didn’t quite fit his face, and admittedly the nicest pair of lips she’d ever seen on a man. She’s sure her quick glance over had lasted too long and her eyes slowly drift back in front of her.

Then he does it again.Leans over.This time she’s sure he’s even closer and his bottom lip might have accidentally brushed against her.This time she doesn’t laugh though, cause she’s sure what he said wasn’t funny (even though for the life of her she can’t focus on the actual words).She’s positive her heartbeat was audible now because when he pulled away his hand hovered over the armrest between them and her hand was there and he touched it.  He doesn’t try to grab it, his knuckles just grazed against hers, appearing almost accidental though she knew it wasn't.It’s nice.At the gesture Rey’s pointer figure flew out and caught his pinky as it pulled away.It only lasted for a second before Rey realized what she has done and shoved her hand in the near empty popcorn tub.He snickered, and Rey wondered if her whole head would fit in the bucket in her lap. 

The movie couldn’t end quick enough after that. The second the credits had begun to roll Reywas on her feet and heading towards the doors.Ren followed, but at a much calmer pace.She didn’t say a word to him when they reentered the lobby. She couldn’t even find words if she wanted too. 

“Are you planning on taking the train?” Ren broke the silence just before they were about to exit the warmth of indoors into the dark winter night.

“Usually do.”She managed to reply.Thanking God that he had said something first.

“Trust me, if the circumstances were different I would take you home for you,” he quickly assured, nerves carrying in his voice just at the mention of ‘home.' “I will walk with you to the train station, though.”  
  
“Don’t worry about it. I do it all the time.”They took the plunge outside and Rey geared her stride toward the nearest station. 

“It’s nighttime in the city. No one should be walking alone out here.”  
  
“I think I can handle myself,” Rey took a deep breath and smirked, pointing up at his bruised eye.He frowned.

“Good, now I know you can defend yourself against defenseless passerby who has no idea what’s going on.How about someone who actually wants to hurt you?”

“I’m pretty sure I could beat you in a fight,” she teased, her heart finally calming.

“I’m like… twice your size, Rey.” 

“I still think I would win.I’m pretty quick.”

“You have experience?” He said with raised eyebrows.   
  
“You’d be surprised.”

He grinned at this.Then with an exasperated breath while grasping his hair he gave in, “I’ll just take you, I’ll drop you off around the corner of something,”

“Oh! Just like sneaking out in High School.” 

“You were a rebel weren’t you?” 

“Eh, just a nuisance.”

“That’s something we have in common, I guess.”He said this in all seriousness, gazing off ahead.She’s drawn to him, and she’s started not to fear admitting that.Either he’s playing her like a fiddle or he’s utterly fascinating when he starts to break. 

He changed their direction through the Plaza. 

“My car is parked up here.”

She followed. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> inexorably-drawn-to-you.tumblr.com  
> Thanks for reading! This is always a fun cool down project for me, it's appreciated that you've stopped by!


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEYO.  
> Cooldown fic update at last. This one is supposed to be my mindless easy fic to update and it still took me forever -___- to be fair the chapter is much longer than usual.
> 
> BUT LOOK. THINGS. HAPPENING.

He had leaned in.Maybe. 

Rey was in bed at Leia’s, so technically his bed, and she couldn’t sleep.Everything she was feeling was absolute torture.She had her phone in her hand ready to call someone, and she _needed_ to talk to someone.She knew Finn would be the voice of reason, but maybe that’s not what she wanted.She knew Poe would be relentless in his teasing, and she didn’t want that either. Leia was already asleep, and it’s not like she could talk to her about this anyway. 

Just as her inner turmoil was about to get the better of her, her phone buzzed. 

‘ _How did it go?’_ From Poe.  The message followed by a colorful array of patronizing emojis.  She worked on a response for a few seconds before Poe sent another message.  ‘Unless it’s still going on…’ followed by five rows of winking smilies.

She thought better of the situation and immediately called Finn. 

“Rey, some people have work tomorrow,” he grumbled after a few rings. Rey looked over at the clock on the bedside table.It was just a little before midnight. 

“I’m sorry,”  she groaned, hoping he would sense her exasperation and agree to stay on the line.

“What’s wrong?” He obliged tiredly. 

“I went on a date, and I need you to talk some sense into me.” 

“… have all my past attempts not worked?” Finn replied monotonously, already knowing the direction of this conversation. 

“Look, just tell me how you honestly feel about the whole thing.”She readied herself for the blow. 

“Well, was the date with who I think it was with?”  
  
It took her a few moments before she could respond, but hesitantly she confirmed.

“Then you know I think it’s a horrible idea, Rey.”He almost sounded angry, and Rey regretted even bringing it up. “He’s your bosses basically estranged son.The boss who you are currently staying with.”

“I…yeah,” she resided.

“But you like him?” He was clearly frustrated, but his tone softened. 

“He…intriques me.”

“Rey, he’s a basket case, I know you haven’t seen it, or maybe you don’t believe me, but if there is one thing you should trust me on… it’s this.”Rey felt like she was being talked to by a parent.She knew this would be Finn’s response, it’s what she needed to hear, but why did she want so eagerly want to tune it out?

“He just doesn’t seem that bad…”

“It’s an act, Rey, or maybe he’s just having just a good day,”Finn paused, “I know you aren’t supposed to believe everything you read but just look the guy up.  There is a reason I'm telling you this.I have personal experiences with it.He’s a ticking time bomb.”

“Fine.”She snapped, feeling herself scowl.

“It’s just a bad idea Rey.I’m saying this as your friend.You wanted my honest opinion, and here it is.”

They were both quiet after that. 

“Thanks, Finn.” She heard a mumble of a goodnight from his end and then she ended the call. 

The arm holding her phone collapsed onto the bed. She needed to hear that, or at least that is what she kept telling herself.Calling Finn was the right idea.  She needed some sense talked into her.  She told herself all of these things, but she still had the urge to call Poe so he could tease her about the whole thing, and maybe make her feel like she wasn’t a complete idiot for feeling these things. 

Ren had leaned in that night.Maybe her mind was playing tricks on her, maybe she was just seeing things, or _maybe_ she was just seeing what she wanted to see. 

They had pulled over three streets from Leia’s, and Rey was picking up her stuff from the passenger side floor. 

“You know your way from here?”He was nervous. 

“Yes, for the hundredth time, I'm all right.” Rey laughed.

“Just, uh, let me know when you get in the house.”

“For someone who advertises themselves as an aloof punk, you undoubtedly worry a lot.This is a nice neighborhood, and you know that.” 

He ran his fingers through his hair and clenched his fists in it. “Yeah I know, I just couldn’t forgive myself if something happened because I’m too afraid to drive you to close to my mother’s.”

“Trust me, if anyone crossed my path, I’d be more worried about them.” 

He looked over at her and relaxed a little.His hands fell from his hair and his shoulders hunched forward. He smirked a bit with a small chuckle. 

“Thank you,” Rey said, referring to the evening they had shared, “I’ll see you.”

“Goodnight, Rey.” 

But neither of them moved.Ren folded his lips and nodded to himself in silence, his eyes darting about before turning back to the passenger seat. Rey grinned and lightly patted her knees. She didn’t know what she was waiting for. It was her turn to do something and get out of the car. She looked over again and let out soft snort with a shrug.

That’s when she swore he leaned in.It was slight, and maybe she was just thinking too much into it, but she was nearly positive he was closer now and had lowered himself slightly.Her heart pounded, and her vision went blurry, and maybe she was just seeing things. But before she had the time to process what she wanted he sat up and looked out the windshield. 

“Goodnight,” she whispered and swung open her door.After properly positioning her bag on her shoulder Rey began her light jog down the sidewalk. 

She did text him when she walked in the house though.The lights had been turned off, and she assumed Leia was already in bed. 

_'I made it back. I’m alive.'_  
  
'Good to hear, how many men did you have to kill?'

_'3.It was a slow night.'_

_'Goodnight, slayer.'_

Now she was here, sprawled out in bed, technically his bed, with a racing mind that had no intention of slowing. 

 

—

 

“Someone looks like they didn’t sleep.” 

Rey jolted from her desk as Poe passed by, slamming a stack of papers against it.While Rey rubbed the dark circles under her eyes, Poe knelt behind the back of the table, eagerly waiting for the story on folded elbows. 

“Yes to the not sleeping thing, and no, not because of what you think,”Rey moaned.“Do I look that bad?”

“I wouldn’t say 'bad,' I’ve seen you look worse.”

“Thanks.”She scorned.

“You didn’t text me last night! How did it go?”

She debated how truthful she should be.She knew if she told him everything she’d wind up deeper down this rabbit hole than she'd ever intended, and if she just told him it was nothing perhaps then she could move on. 

Finn was right, and she knew he was.Everything about pursuing or exploringwhat she may or may not be feeling was idiotic.It would save everyone a lot of nonsense if she just shoved it under a rug for people to forget about.

“I don’t think it’s going to go anywhere,” she managed to say as casually as possible.

“…” Poe was silent, sensing the distress in his friend, “He didn’t hurt you, did he?”There was a bite in his voice that was almost daunting.

“No, not at all!” Rey quickly clarified, “it was actually a nice evening.” 

“And the problem is…?” He was relieved. 

“It’s just… complicated.I mean, he’s been plenty nice to me, but you’ve heard the stories.It’s probably best to not get involved.”

“Finn told you that,” Poe deadpanned, not believing the sincerity of any of her words. “Look, I know he's looking out for you, but just repeating his story isn’t going to change how you feel.” 

Rey didn’t respond to that.She just pretended to look at something on her computer screen and starting typing gibberish onto an empty page. 

“Fine, we don’t have to talk about _that,_ but I’ve got a couple of new songs for you to look at.”He motioned at the stack of papers he was still holding.“I also think we should re-record our duet from our demo.”

“I don’t know Poe…” she sighed.

“It’s one of our best, Rey.”He pouted with wide eyes. 

“If it’s on our album, then people will expect us to perform it, I’m not sure I could do that in front of more than twenty people.”

“Well, luckily for you, we don’t have anyone else who cares at the moment.” 

Rey scrunched up her face in disapproval as she thought, “maybe.”

“Awesome.But still look at the other compositions. I promise you don’t sing in any of them aside from the duet.”He pushed the pile towards her and she flipped through the pages absentmindedly. Poe retreated and headed towards his own desk. 

As soon as Poe was settled in his spot, Rey grabbed an unused folder from her cabinet and shoved the papers inside.  She placed the entire thing into her bag for safe keeping and fell into her hands.  Her mind too exhausted to run as fast as it was going.

She started to fidget at her desk.  She pulled up a search browser then looked over at Finn who was nibbling on a granola bar at his desk.He’d waved at her as she came in this morning, the same as he’d always had, not even mentioning the conversation they had shared the previous night. 

An overwhelming sense of guilt rushed over her as her fingers landed upon her keyboard.Taking a deep breath, she took the plunge.

‘Kylo Ren Starkiller’She pressed enter.

Hundreds of thousands of results in seconds.She didn’t know what she was expecting.

_'Kylo Ren of Starkiller fame fined for Destruction of Property.'_

 

_'Starkiller Star caught throwing Furniture outside Arkanis Hotel Window.'_

 

_'Intoxicated Starkiller Singer, Kylo Ren, Smashes Car Window after Concert.'_

 

_'Han Solo Killed in Car Accident, Son Kylo Ren in critical-.'_

 

Rey closed the browser before finishing the title. She cursed her curiosity and there was a rock in the pit of her stomach. Finn was right.  She’d only read four results and none of them could even be misconstrued as positive.Maybe everything Ren had expressed with her was an act after all.Rey thought she’d learn to read people a bit better after all these years, but for some reason, she always seemed to attract the worst kind.

 

—

 

He’d sent her only one message in the days to follow.Some small-talk about the snow. Rey typed out twenty different responses before throwing her phone in frustration. 

She paced the room, his room, and the thud from her phone must have caught Leia’s attention.

“Honey, are you all right?” The woman said from the main level. 

“Yes, Leia!” She shouted, running over to grab her phone from the carpet in which she tossed it, “Just dropped my phone!”

He was a monster.A wolf in sheep’s clothing.Yet there was still this pining sensation Rey felt to go and prove it to herself.She was stubborn.There were thousands of people telling her exactly what she expected but for some reason so wouldn't believe it.Sure, he was a little smug, maybe lacked some social skills, but that was to be expected of someone who probably had their entire life served to them on a platter. 

And here this monster was, sending her messages about snow. _Menacing_. 

She growled.She kept telling herself that she didn’t like him like that or want him in that way.That she wasn’t some girl who had fallen for the dark mysterious stranger with money and a sordid past like some trashy romance novel.But who was she kidding?She was curious and wanted answers. The more red flags that there were the more she wanted to explore them.Certainly, time would calm these temptations, but Rey had spent her whole life waiting for answers, and she was decidedly done. 

 

‘ _Do you have any plans this Friday?’_

 

She chuckled as his response was immediate.

 

_ ‘Our tour just ended, so I’m flexible for awhile.’ _

 

‘ _I sometimes go to this bar uptown, they have live music, open mic stuff, I was thinking about going.’_

 

_—_

 

She caught herself staring when he sauntered in the room.Grey hoodie pulled over his head, sunglasses tucked in the collar of his shirt, and hands buried in his pockets in an attempt to stay warm.He lit up slightly when he saw her and pulled his hood down, his hair flipping down from it in a subtle wave.He really was a wolf in sheep’s clothing. 

“Hey,” he said as he approached her at the bar, taking the empty stool next to her, looking comically ill fitted upon it. 

“Hey.”She was still staring.He had small moles and freckles scattered across his face.  He smelled nice.She was trying so hard to see this monster she’d been preparing for, but instead she saw him.This average, almost sensitive looking, Joe.Who’d just ordered a large cup of water at a bar.

“Are you okay?”He had noticed her daze.

“Yeah, yeah.. “ she murmured, still lost in her thoughts. 

He sighed as if he knew what was coming, “something is bothering you.”

“I looked you up online,” she blurted. Surprising herself for being so forward.

“Of course you did,” he said expectantly, slightly backing away. He let out a disgruntled sigh and took an exceedingly large gulp from his drink, despite it not being alcoholic. It seemed habitual. “How much did you learn?”

“A decent amount,” she replied, lightly toying with the bowl of pretzels in front of her.The two sat in silence. “I stopped.I’m sorry I shouldn’t have done that.”

“Done what?”

“I feel like I went behind your back or something…”

He was quiet, not necessarily disagreeing with her. Rey felt her heart sink looking at him.

“Look,” he started, groaning, clenching the sides of his head, “I get it, I’m not mad or anything. How could I be? I just… it was nice.”

“What was?”

“I don’t know, having someone who didn’t know, or didn’t care about all that stuff… kinda nice starting over.But so that you know… some of it’s true, some of it’s not.I’m…getting help for the stuff that is true.”

“I’m sorry,” she choked.

“Don’t apologize, please.” He sounded so desperate. “That is all public information. I can’t hide that.Probably for the best that I can’t hide from it.”

“It… I don’t think it changes anything.It just… took me some time,”Rey said, in an almost whisper, regretting the words that escaped her mouth.He looked over at her with a raised eyebrow and her throat closed. 

“Uh… really?”Rey turned in the opposite direction, not daring to look him in the eyes, but she nodded sheepishly.“…good.” 

The live music finally started, blaring out the potential for any further conversation and Rey stared up to the heavens in a silent thank you.She swiveled in her chair to face the performer, a younger man with tan skin, and absurdly colored hair. He’d begun his set, and it wasn’t anything that Rey particular found pleasing, but at this moment she focused all of her attention on that stage. 

“You came here to play didn’t you?” he leaned over to say.

“mhhm?” Rey pretended not to hear over the sound.Hoping he’d just drop the conversation.

“You come here to do the whole open mic thing, why else would you endure this torture.”He leaned in closer.

Rey turned to face him and he remade his distance, “I think about it, I guess.Sometimes I make it as far as to bring my guitar, but I haven’t played.Once a month or so I come, I don’t play, and realize I’m pretty happy letting others take the lead.”

“You should do it.”

“With you here? Of course not.The only reason I ever consider it is because I don’t know anyone here.”

“What if I… play with you.So you won’t be alone up there.”

“You don’t know any of my songs. I sure as hell don’t know any of yours.No offense.”

“You’d be surprised.”  
  
“What do you mean?”

“I told you I knew your stuff before I even met you.”He was embarrassed now as if he was being caught in a lie.

“….and?”

“My mother sent me the Demo you made, and the one you'd made with your group, she thought I might like it.”he started, “it was a couple years ago, we still weren’t on the best of terms, but she’d still send me things that she’d thought I’d like.”

“Oh.” 

“It was really good, the kind of stuff… well… my family’s big on the genre.The alternative folky stuff.”He muttered.The first of the live performers finished and the crowd broke into a polite applause. 

“That doesn’t mean you could play it with me.”  
  
“I remember that sort of stuff,” he began before she could even finish like this was a response he’s had to give a hundred times. 

“I… um… I have the sheet music for one of our old songs.”  She opened her bag and took the folder from it.   “But neither of us even have a guitar here. There’s no point.”  She couldn’t believe she was playing with the idea.

“I’m sure some kid won't mind if I borrow one.” He motioned to the crowd surrounding the stage.  He moved his hand to reach for the sheet music and the slightest smile crossed his face.

“Poe wants to rerecord it,”  Rey said, handing it to him.

“I like this one.” He stood from his bar seat and offered his hand for Rey.   She hesitated but stayed still.

“I don’t know about this.”

“Come on. No one here knows you!”  
  
“But people know you!”

He grabbed the sunglasses hanging off his collar and put them on his face.  “Better?”

Rey shrugged and reached into her bag and pulled out a red beanie.  She stood from her chair then up on her toes to tug the hat onto his head.  She fell back on her heels and grinned, “much better. The hair is a dead giveaway.”

He rolled his eyes and pulled her with him as he headed towards the stage. Rey stayed a few steps behind as he approached a bearded man with a clipboard who must have been serving as the stage manager and she awkwardly roamed the room, pretending she wasn’t actually going along with this.She caught Ren slipping the stage manager 20 bucks and he made his way back to Rey.

“Why did you give him money.”She glared.

“He knew who I was,” he said a matter-of-factly. 

“So you gave him money?”

“Eh, I just told him to write down some average joe name instead,”Ren said with a flip of his hand, “rather not have too many people call me out,”he paused, “plus he’s letting me borrow his guitar.” 

“Ugh, I don’t know about this.” Rey felt a chill run up her spine. 

“It will be fun, I promise.”He didn’t necessarily sound convincing but the attempt was thoughtful.“A couple weeks ago you were gearing up to go on tour with one of the biggest bands in the world. How does this freak you out?”

“I… I’m in the background for my group.Poe gets all the attention, and he loves it, so it works out,”She sighed,“Singing is a whole other story.”

“Trust me. You’ll be okay.”He pushed her once more towards the curtained backstage area. “I’ll meet you up there. I’m going to grab beardy’s guitar.”

“You’ve got the sheet music right?”

He grabbed it folded up in his pocket, Rey grimaced at the disrespect for her property but really couldn’t be bothered too much in her current panic. “Got it, but I don’t need it.”

“Just in case,” she grunted at his arrogance.He walked off, and she ducked behind the curtain, trying to calm her breath. She found herself counting during her inhales and exhales and maybe her pulse was beginning to settle.  Ren was right.If she wanted to perform in front of thousands, she’d have to get used to playing for a few dozen. Singing or not. 

“You the kid with that… Ben guy?”The same stage manager from before approached her. 

“Ben?” she bemused. 

“The guy with the sunglasses and beanie.”He wasn’t about to play a guessing game, and he gave a cartoonish wink at the hint.

She laughed a bit at the ‘average’ name Ren had given this man, but she nodded, “Yup.”

“Well, you’re on next.  Once the lights dim out you and your partner can go set up.”

“Okay,” she hummed, looking once again for said partner. After a minute or so he casually strolled over with an acoustic strapped to his back.As the stage hand had said, the lights dimmed and Rey shot Ren once last look of sheer terror.

“Good luck, kid.”He smirked, ruffling her hair which she had regrettably worn down that day.She brushed it back with her hands and followed him onto the stage, fumbling slightly in the dim lights. She barely found the mic when the stage lit up.

But she instantly found herself feeling more comfortable at that moment. She blessed the universe for stage lights.  It was so dark in this bar that it was nearly impossible to make out any shapes from the crowd with the lights blaring down.There was a light murmur from the bar patrons as she adjusted the mic for her height and Ren was plucking the strings on the guitar behind her.She looked at him with clenched teeth from nerves and watched how comfortable he was.This didn’t faze him at all.If anything he looked bored.  
  
He looked up with a curious brow peaking up from his sunglasses, “are you ready?”

She nodded even though her answer wasn’t entirely accurate. Her body froze looking back at him, not believing she’d made it this far.She could leave.  There was still time. She could have a ‘coughing’ fit and excuse herself before she was humiliated.She was about ready to tell him she couldn’t do this when he shook his head at her, not letting her chicken out. 

He started a steady strum and Rey darted back toward the audience.Never feeling more aware of her hands in her life.They fidgeted at her sides before grasping the microphone stand.She’d missed her first cue in the distraction, but he seamlessly replayed the opening riff and she leaned into the mic. 

She’d sung this song countless times during _The Resistance’s_ early days, but it was only now that she realized what a sappy love song it was.She almost wanted to cringe at the lyrics as they poured from of her mouth, but as no one had booed her off stage yet, she continued. She could see the faint silhouettes in the crowd, swaying together, and maybe this wasn’t going to be such a train wreck after all.  Singing felt good. 

He joined in at the chorus, quietly, just filling out her own vocals with harmony.

He had easily adjusted to Poe’s original part.He sounded much better this way, smooth and slow.She wondered how on earth he ended up with the trash bin that was _Starkiller_ when his voice was much better fit for softer genres. But she supposed that just because you were good at something doesn't mean you like it. Though like this, he was almost hypnotic. 

She’d reached the final verse of the song, and it was only then that the songs lyrics echoed in her head and thudded in her heart.She looked behind her one last time, and she felt herself smile.She was having fun.She wasn’t scared or nervous anymore. She was just filled with a rush that she’d long since forgotten she could experience.The last words left her mouth in a near whisper, to him, and she audience broke out in enthusiastic applause. 

Rey gazed forward and gave the audience a slight nod as her leaving gesture, and Ren was gone when she looked back. Undoubtedly returning the guitar he had borrowed. She sauntered down the stage steps to the curtained backstage area when the next act ran towards her.

“That was really beautiful!” They said, almost starry-eyed. 

Rey was beaming, nearly shaking with pride, “Thank you!” 

“You have a fantastic voice… and…tell Kylo Ren he should start playing this kind of stuff again, suits him much better than his _Starkiller_ stuff.”They said with a smirk, crossing their arms over their guitar strap. 

“He doesn’t disguise easily, I take it.” Rey snickered but didn’t even care.  
  
“Not even a little.”They laughed and walked up the stage. 

She turned to walk back towards the main bar area when two arms wrapped around her waist and she was two feet in the air in a tight embrace. 

“You were fantastic,”Ren said setting her back to the floor, but hands still resting on her hips.

“That… wasn't terrible.Thank you.”Rey managed through fits of laughter, “I never thought that would feel so good, you know? My heart is still racing!”She placed her hands on his chest, and his heart was pounding too.

“In a good way, I hope,”he got a little quieter.

“Definitely.” 

Neither of them was in any rush to move from their position.The music started up again and she slung her arms around his shoulders and wrapped her hands around his neck, toying with the light hairs at the base of his head.He shivered at the sensation, but leaned into it, pressing his forehead to hers, hands still wrapped around her hips. 

He refused to look at her, knowing he’d be a lost cause if he did.She slipped her hands into the back of his shirt and though she couldn’t hear him over the music, she could feel the vibrations echo from his chest.He radiated heat, and Rey felt her hands burn at the touch. 

He dragged his hands with a soothing touch up her sides, and one down the length of her arm, grabbing her hand once he reached it, holding it up to their hearts.Swaying with her to the muddled music coming through the black fabric.She leaned into his chest, pressing her ear against his heart, bathing in how human this felt. 

The second she started to relax he spun her so her back was against his chest.His arms crossed across her waist, continuing to rock with her.  At first, he rested his head atop hers, and she could feel him press into her hair.  With a breathy sigh, she leaned into him more, absorbing his warmth.  His head moved from hers to her shoulder, humming with contentment.  Then he had the gall to press his lips against her neck.He tucked her hair behind her shoulder and weighed into her.He didn’t kiss her. He just held his mouth against her. _The bastard_. With every exhale his breath ran warm on her skin, and her legs weakened. 

She turned herself around again, knowing they both were lost.His hands were pulling her in tightly by her waist while her’s slid fully into his hair.She’s wanted to do that for awhile, and it did not disappoint.

“When you said, ‘it doesn’t change anything’… what did you mean?” he whispered so softly over her lips she swore they were already kissing.

She was feeling bold.Adrenaline was coursing through her veins more ferociously than it had in years.“I meant... it doesn’t change how I want tonight to end.”Then she found herself being the one to close the minuscule gap between them. 

It was all consuming.The second their lips touched he groaned into her mouth as if he had waited his entire life for this.   His hands sprawled against her back pulling her deeper.She felt safe and as if she were in a burning building all at the same time.He sucked in her lip, nibbling on it, and Rey could confidently say she had never been kissed that this before.Their mouths crashed again, this time he was coaxing her tongue with his.She dug her hands into his hair and his slid into the back pockets of her jeans.She was surely going to be marked by the time morning came when he started working his way down her neck.

With shaking breath she pulled away reluctantly when she heard the music stop, knowing they wouldn’t be alone for much longer. He pouted childishly at the loss as her hands gently ran down the expanse of his arms.

“We should go.” 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> http://inexorably-drawn-to-you.tumblr.com/
> 
> Thanks for stopping by! Another pass of this chapter will probably happen soon (Don't worry nothing of importance will chance) I just promised myself I would post tonight and I only have 12 minutes left!


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm no quitter!

 

“Do you want anything to drink?” He asked, suddenly uncomfortable, once the door had been closed.  Almost as if all of this was becoming too real and he was nervous. 

Rey chucked off her boots and gawked at the suite, she’d never been in a hotel that included more than one room, and there had been a full kitchen, a sitting area, and a bedroom connected down a short hallway.She supposed she should have felt guilty at the amount of money he’d just spent so they wouldn’t need to drive an hour back to his place, (which he offered.) But she ended up pulling him into the first hotel they’d spotted on the way to his car.  And Ren had been more than eager to throw a credit card at the concierge for immediate accommodation.

“I’m fine,” she said with a bit of curiosity, walking over to his place by the door.She slid her hands up his chest and began to roll his jacket off his shoulders, “stay awhile, why don’t you?” She joked as the hoodie fell to the floor, her adrenaline still taking the lead. 

He swallowed hard.“Do… do you want anything to eat? I can call up room service.”He sauntered over to the hotel phone which was placed on a stand by the couch.He fumbled with the phone for a bit and Rey turned over to him and grabbed his hand.

“Are you alright?” she interjected and he put the phone back on the receiver. 

“Uh, yeah.” This was clearly a lie. 

She let go of his hand and sat over on the couch, her spontaneous brazenness somewhat crushed at his new lack of surety. 

“You’re lying,” she _might_ have huffed and he raised his eyebrows at her puffed cheeks. 

He walked over to her and squatted so she was stationed slightly above him with her position on the sofa.He put his hands on her knees and stared at the touch for a moment, grazing his thumbs over the fabric of her pants.“I’m sorry, I don’t know why I’m getting so….”

Suddenly, Rey burst out laughing and Ren's face scrunched up, slightly taken aback at the response to his attempted admission. “Please, don’t bother with the whole sensitive guy _move._ I’ve made it this far with you, you can cut that crap. _”_

“It’s not a _move,_ ” he snarled slightly, but his usual tone, the one Rey had gotten to know from their past encounters, was returning.  
  
Rey blinked.

“Just because... well... we are _here_...  doesn’t mean I can’t want to enjoy our time together.”He sounded earnest, Rey could admit that, but years of useless lines from other guys had turned her a bit sour. They were both quiet. “I really like you,” he said, his cheeks beginning to flush, and Rey’s beginning to match.The silence to follow was broken by the quiet gurgle from Rey’s stomach and she turned red for an entirely different reason.

“I suppose food would be nice,” she stated as he gave a cocky grin.He pushed himself up using her knees and sat next to her in the spot closest to the room’s phone. 

“You like steak?”He picked up the phone to dial down to the front desk, suddenly more comfortable than he had been the whole evening. 

“I like everything.”

“Everything it is, then.”He smiled and read down the list of menu items through the phone.Rey kicking him with her feet as the list was getting clownishly large, even with his stature and her appetite.

When he hung up the phone he turned to her and swung his arm around her shoulder to pull her into his side.“You were amazing this evening,” he said, and she found herself nuzzling into his side, bringing her hand up to hold the one that was around her shoulder. 

“I honestly can’t believe I did that.” _Did any of this really._

“You should do it more often.”Ren smiled.“You belong center stage. You really do thrive there.”

Rey shook her head, “I don’t think that will be happening anytime soon.”Ren’s grin turned into a grimace and Rey continued, “But… I’ll never say never.”Because a part of her did a admit, tonight felt really good.She felt good about everything. 

“I don’t understand why though.”

Rey could tell Ren was afraid he was getting too personal too quickly, so just as he opened his mouth to change the topic Rey gave him an answer.

“I guess it’s a little weird, having all that attention solely on me.  Poe loves it, I'm not so accustomed to it.”

“You should get used to it,” he said, a few meanings behind his words as he pulled in for one more kiss.Short and chaste compared to their journey here, but it still made Rey regret agreeing to room service and the inevitable wait that came with that.

But in the end, she was grateful for it.She’d eaten 2 and a half full meals, out of the 7 they had ordered and had two to spare by the time both of them had admitted defeat.But they had talked and laughed (and kissed) throughout it and Rey admitted Ren's approach to the evening was right.It really felt like a date.The whole concept still foreign to her.She wasn’t sure how exactly one should feel on a proper date, but she was pretty sure this was it. 

Rey was nursing her second glass of wine when she noticed barely any of the bottle was gone.“You don’t drink?” She blurted out, cursing herself inwardly afterward. 

“What are you talking about?” He pointed to the bottle of water in his hand, playing along.

“Alchohol.”

“...Nope.”

“Never?”

“If you really looked me up, like you said, I think you already know your answer.”He forced a small chuckle, but he pinched between his brows as if he was trying to forget something. 

Rey looked up at the ceiling for a moment, “I’m sorry I did that, by the way.”

“Don’t be sorry.It was only fair.”He paused.“I made those stories happen, It’s my fault for being an ass.”  
  
“Well, I’ve quite enjoyed forming my own opinions instead,” she said, setting her glass down on the coffee table in front of her. 

A few moments of silence passed before he replied with, “I’m glad,” and he kissed her again.And again.Until neither of them had any intention of letting go. 

Rey wrapped her hands around his head until they were trapped in his hair and in turn, he responded by grabbing her waist and pulling her flush against his chest, being guided backward towards the cushions.

The second her body relaxed into the sofa, and she adjusted from the added weight pressing against her, his hands were grasping at the hem of her shirt, waiting for the slightest permission that it could be taken off.  Arching her back slightly, Rey gave him the sign he needed, and soon that garment was discarded alongside the trays of food service. 

His lips left her mouth and started a delicate trek down her chin, neck, collarbone.Mouth hovering above her heart, the heat from his breath made Rey’s skin catch fire.His hand slid from her waist to thumb over the lace of her bra, and he just stared at that action for a few moments.

“Bedroom?” He said in a low growl, a voice that wasn’t his.  She thought she should have been thinking that this was going too fast, but honestly, it couldn't have been going fast enough.  Rey gave him a small nod, and she was swept up in his arms, yelping in surprise as the was hoisted up into the air. 

She had noticed how broad he was before, it was impossible not to.  The way he didn't quite fit into chairs, or how he had to lean into his car, but only in his hold, with her arms around his neck as an attempt to secure herself, did she feel so small compared to him. 

His mouth was on hers every step of the way, running clumsily into each piece of furniture that was in their path. She tried to offer to walk the rest of the way, but only got a few words out before he returned to her lips, effectively stopping any conversation. 

They both fell onto the sheets, she dragging him down by the collar of his shirt, once his shins hit the bed.  “You are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”  He said, his face pressed into her neck.

“You can’t even see me like that.”Rey laughed, trying to reach for the hem of his shirt, as they were still at unfair stages of dress. 

He lifted his head to press the tip of his nose against hers.She couldn’t quite focus on him due to the proximity, but she could feel his eyes boring into her.

“You are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.” He repeated.“Better?”

“…Yes,” she squeaked, finally grabbing hold of the bottom of his shirt. She lifted it over his shoulders, and the moment it was off of his arms, he slammed their bare torsos together and wrapped her up so tightly it made nearly any other movements impossible. 

Rey finally managed to push him back far enough to allow enough space for the rest of their clothes to be removed. 

_He was beautiful._ Like a Greek statue made from the finest marble.She tried to make an audible compliment but it came out as a nervous sputter as her eyes trailed down his body.He wasn’t lacking imperfections though, he was decorated in dark birthmarks and freckles, with scars across his chest.  She unconsciously began to trace them with her fingers before he took her hand and held it above her head.

If there truly was a difference between sex and lovemaking, Rey had never realized it.But there was something different about the way he held her, kissed her, rocked against her.Every moment, while passionate, was so intensely sensual that she found herself having to cover her mouth to stop her from embarrassing herself.Each movement was solely focused on her, from the way he kissed her breasts to the way his hand slid between their bodies as he moved inside her.

It affected her in a way that she couldn’t understand.This had always been such a lackluster activity in the past, just a craving to be fulfilled, and now she was biting on her fingers to stop herself from moaning his name as she jolted upwards when her body tensed from release.He followed suit a few seconds later,grunting into her shoulder sending vibrations through her entire body. 

He huffed against her neck, shoulders tensed.Rey slid her arms under his and wrapped in a last embrace before he flopped to his side.Crossing his elbow over his eyes, he smiled as he continued trying to catch his breath, and Rey continued to flush at the sight.Because he truly was beautiful.Oddly so. Exquisitely so. 

“You’re staring.” He mocked, peeking out from under his arm. 

“Am not.” She childishly defended, turning to her side, nuzzling herself against his chest. He took his arm and wrapped it underneath her and started to softly drag his fingers up and down the expanse of her back. Her eyes closed, her cheek pressed against his pec, and in that moment she thought she truly understood what it was to be wanted. 

 

—

Rey, who had woken up alone on every other day of her life, had never felt it more when waking up to an empty bed the next morning. 

She didn’t know what she expected really, she didn’t really expect him to stay, but maybe she hoped he would.She wanted to kick herself for thinking that this time it would have been any different, for expecting it to be. Pulling the blanket up to cover herself she surveyed the floor to locate her clothing, his, unsurprisingly, were gone. 

Unwelcome thoughts filled her brain.This was the first person she’d let this close to her in years, and he had played her.Of course, he had.  He was probably bitter about the embarrassment she caused him when they first met.  He must have planned this as some sort of sick revenge.She felt sick as her chin began to quiver.She continued to berate herself for feeling this way, for falling for this whole ordeal, but her burning eyes would let those emotions go numb.His game was so easy to figure out in hindsight, he’d managed to court her, get her our of her well-constructed shell, causing her to ignore all common sense, all without raising suspicion.Rey cursed under her breath as she inhaled a sharp sniff and a tear began to roll down her cheek.

She’d been so naive.Sliding out of the bed, taking the sheet with her, she grabbed her pants and other garments. She searched frantically for her shirt before remembering that it had been discarded outside of the bedroom.   She shuffled out the doorway, sheet around her.  
  
Ren was sitting on a barstool sipping coffee in only his pants when she exited the room, the rest of his clothes sitting on the stool next to him.  When he noticed her he brightened with attention, standing and wrapping his arms around the sheet covered girl.

He pressed his lips to hers and as he pulled away tucked her hair behind her ears, “Good morning, sweetheart,” he sighed, gazing at her as if they had been together for years.Rey almost had to remind herself that they haven’t been, and just moments ago she was convinced this had been a one night stand. 

“Oh,” Rey sighed as she felt the remnant of a tear fall from the corner of her eye.Ren’s eyes grew wide at the sight as he processed how distressed she looked.

“Rey, are you okay!?’ he exclaimed as he led her to one of the barstools to sit.She obliged and he leaned down in front of her, cupping her face in his hands and neither of their eyes left the other. She pulled the sheet around her even closer while she couldn’t form words. “Rey?”

“You are still here-“ she murmured and she felt her nose sting and more tears welling.

“Of cour-“ he stopped, “did you think I had left?” a wave of guilt hit him and his expression melted. 

“I just… I’m not crazy I swear,” she choked, quickly wiping her eyes and attempting to regain her composure, a vulnerability not a color she liked wearing.  She couldn't imagine how insane she looked right now, crying over a date that she hardly knew, hardly should be attached too. 

“No-no,” he had the gall to smile at her, “I’m glad you wanted me to stay.”

She didn’t respond, and she didn’t know how to really.She hummed in acknowledgment that he spoke but looked down at her bare feet, and every reason why she had avoiding these sorts of entanglements the last few years came rushing back to her.And she had every instinct to run.If the thought of a one-night relationship ending made her heart feel like this, imagine if it went on for months, for years. 

But she didn’t run.She just leaned into his embrace, basking in its warmth. 

She had a really bad feeling about this. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was always my cool down fic when writing It's a Parent Trap, and this week I really needed a cool down. 
> 
> Also: I like keeping things at the mature rating, so intimate scenes will always sort of be... more about the emotional perspective than the physical. BUT THEY THERE.


End file.
